Keep It Up, Donald Trump. You're Just Making Robert Mueller's Job Easier.


How was your weekend? Was it better than Donald Trump's weekend? Yes, it was!

On Friday night, Attorney General Jeff Sessions undertook the stupid and bizarre action of firing former FBI Deputy Director Andrew McCabe less than 48 hours before his retirement was supposed to kick in, which was immediately seen as a cave to the imperious whims of President Shitbag McGee, who hates Andrew McCabe. Saturday morning, Trump personal legal idiot John Dowd excitedly emailed reporters in purple comic sans (not a joke) that, after the firing of McCabe, a witness in Robert Mueller's obstruction of justice probe against the president, he was hoping and praying Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein would end the FAKE NEWS DEMOCRATIC HOAX Mueller investigation. Dowd quickly clarified to multiple reporters that he was only speaking in purple comic sans (still not a joke) for his own dumb bad lawyer self, and not for his dumb bad client.

But oh boy, the weekend's events sure did give the president a spring in his step and a stiffy in his panties! He spent the rest of the weekend obstructing justice to Robert Mueller's face, on Twitter:

That's right, idiot. There are no Republicans on the Mueller team. Besides, you know, Robert Mueller, and also some others. But other than that! Fucking hell.

Each time one of these tweets would come out, we imagine Robert Mueller would print it out and put it on top of the "obstruction" pile, which is currently one million miles tall. These tweets are notable, though, because before now, Trump, respecting at least one of his lawyers' wishes, hasn't gone directly after Mueller. Not anymore!

So what does this mean? Is Trump going to fire Robert Mueller? Do we have to take over the streets and refuse to leave until Mueller is reinstated? Well, not right now, according to Trump legal idiot person Ty Cobb:

“In response to media speculation and related questions being posed to the Administration," attorney Ty Cobb said in a statement, “the White House yet again confirms that the President is not considering or discussing the firing of the Special Counsel, Robert Mueller.”

Oh well OK, guess it's no big deal and this is just what happens when all the adult supervision has left the White House and there's nobody to stop Trump from binge-watching "Fox & Friends" naked for hours on end.

Congressional Republicans responded with milquetoast warnings that if Trump tries to fire Mueller, he will be in Big Trouble Mister, You'll See:

“If he tried to do that, that would be the beginning of the end of his presidency, because we're a rule-of-law nation,” Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) told CNN’s Jake Tapper on Sunday. [...]

Sen. James Lankford (R-Okla.) said Sunday that the president may have a point when it comes to the number of Democrats on Mueller's team, but he largely praised the special counsel for limiting leaks and for the detailed information included in the Feb. 16 indictment of 13 Russian nationals and other businesses for their alleged role in interfering with the election.

See what we mean? Totally milquetoast!

Here are more Republicans, vaguely paying lip service to the notion that doing the Saturday Night Massacre would be totally uncool, bro:

The House speaker, Paul D. Ryan, Republican of Wisconsin, issued a statement ... warning Mr. Trump to back off. “As the speaker has always said, Mr. Mueller and his team should be able to do their job,” said AshLee Strong, spokeswoman. His counterpart, Senator Mitch McConnell of Kentucky, had no comment, as did a number of other top Senate Republicans.

Strangely, the most forceful statement came from Rep. Trey Gowdy (R-Benghazi), who said of John Dowd's comments that if his client is innocent as they swear up and down he is, "ACT LIKE IT." But what are they supposed to do if Trump is actually guilty, as he almost certainly is? It is a conundrum.

Trump wants to fire Robert Mueller. We all know that. Just last week, we learned Mueller has been dancing in the endzone on the other side of Trump's "red line," by subpoenaing records from the Trump family business, on Russia, and also on other stuff. Oh yes, Mueller is all the way up Trump's ass, and he probably has him dead to rights on a thousand crimes.

And now Trump has seen with the firing of Andrew McCabe that he might be able to get away with it, because this current crop of Republicans would defend Hitler if you gave them a Snausage and some tax cuts for rich people to distract them.

So, according to the New York Times, Trump has decided being nice to Mueller is no longer a good idea, because Trump absolutely certainly has a functioning good brain. We don't know if Trump will ultimately try to fire Mueller, but he's going to keep throwing out these trial balloons and keeping testing the limits of what he can get away with.

Dipshit should really keep it up, because he's making Mueller's job easier.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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