First They Came For Newsmax. What Next? The Weather Channel And 'Ancient Aliens' And Jesus?

Because you are a woke M&M, you probably didn't even know there was a genocide going, as evidenced by DirecTV deciding it no longer wants to host Newsmax, one of the last bastions for real news.

GENOCIDE! Republicans Furious That AT&T Is Cancel Culturing Newsmax, A Vital And Profitable News Source

Don't listen to liberals who say a corporation making a business decision about hosting another corporation is just the free market at work and maybe if Newsmax wanted to be more attractive to DirecTV and parent company AT&T it would smile more. This is censorship, and this is stolen election, and this is cancel culture, and this is a bunch of other things. Is it Peter Strzok? Probably. What about RAY EPPS, is this RAY EPPS? Yes. Is it Hunter's laptop? Oh you bet it is.

It is also the Holocaust. White conservative MAGA people are being Holocausted, and here to explain us why is white conservative idiot GOP Rep. Eric Burlison of Missouri, during last night's floor speeches:

Burlison began by whining about the Department of Homeland Security's efforts to set up a disinformation board last year, which were attacked by the rightwing internet thus putting a target on the back of the woman who was tapped to run it. Of course, the prime purveyors of disinformation in the United States are rightwing conservative media. So they had to destroy her.

But Burlison said that now, there are companies the government "has given special privilege to," which are set on the task of silencing conservatives. (LOL.) First, they came for the One America News. And now?

Now they’re going after Newsmax.

It can't be because these networks are just shitty, unprofitable garbage.

You know, there’s a famous quote about what happened during the Holocaust when individuals when the Nazis first came for some and people said nothing and then eventually they’ll come for you.

And someday Eric Burlison will look up that quote to see what it says.

And I say this not as a Republican or a Missourian,

But just as a common dumbass.

but as a concerned citizen for a country who has these rights that were here because of the blood that was shed by thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of patriots

Somebody's shedding the blood.

from the time of the American Revolution until today.

In Jesus's name, Amen.

So again, this is all the Holocaust.

Lauren Boebert had her own "First they came for the ..." speech, but hers was a lot more along the lines of "First they came for the Baby Back Ribs but the wait was really long at the Chili's by my house, so I went to Olive Garden for the unlimited soup, salad and breadsticks, but they said Ms. Boebert you are still banned from the Olive Garden on account of what happened last time, and I said fine fuck you I hate you, and now I'm in the Taco Bell drive-through and those bitches better give me enough fire sauces this time, I am not driving back up here, swear to God I'm not. Wait what were we talking about? Oh yeah, the Newsmax Holocaust."

Tell us about the slippery slope we're dealing with here, Congressman:

OAN was deplatformed by DirecTV in April of 2022. So what’s next? Fox News?

No, Fox News is successful.

Will the Weather Channel be canceled next if they refuse to bow to the Left’s altar of climate change?

The Weather Channel talks about climate change. We're all good.

But yes, the Gentlewoman from Colorado is worried that AT&T is going to do Holocaust Cancels to the Weather Channel, and also?

What about the History Channel? We see on a regular basis the Left wants to erase history and deny truth.

Far be it from us to demand the cancellation of "Ancient Aliens" and "Pawn Stars" and other similar vital educational programming.

How about TBN? There has definitely been an increase in disdain and intolerance by many liberals for Christian beliefs simply by saying we love Jesus. So is TBN next? Americans are tired of cancel culture.

Oh yes, that old canard, that liberals hate all Christians just because they say they love Jesus. As opposed to how we detest rightwing Christians because they're vile racist misogynistic anti-LGBTQ+ bigots.

Also it's good to know that when Lauren Boebert thinks "Christianity," she thinks "Trinity Broadcasting Network." Tells you what kinda spiritual level she's working on.

We are sorry to have to end this post, but we are too busy cruelly laughing at these people's suffering and want to do it a whole bunch more.

[JoeMyGod / also]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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