If Geraldo Rivera wants to post towel selfies, we say fuck yeah, Geraldo Rivera, post you some towel selfies! We are not doing this newfangled "sarcasm" thing when we say this country and its people should have less shame.

Before you ask, no, Geraldo was not #weinered. He did not get caught accidentally sending public DMs. He decided to post his naked body on the Internet, for all of us to enjoy. Here, let us let him splain it: "70 is the new 50 (Erica and family are going to be so pissed...but at my age...) pic.twitter.com/KU9IQhaF0w." And why the fuck not? If Helen Mirren can waltz her ass around lookin' tuff in the altogether, then it Men's Rights or something, it is only fair.

Feeling good about 70-year-old you? Why not? Jew look mahvelous! (THAT IS A REFERENCE FOR GERALDO RIVERA'S FELLOW 70-YEAR-OLDS.)

In conclusion, we are 100 percent behind Geraldo Rivera posting towel selfies, we are not being sarcastic, and we think this is a victory for positive body images and should be a lesson for teen girls everywhere, the end.


Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


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