Meghan McCain Gives Cory Booker Rest Of What's Left Of Her Mind

Because no one in the Wonkette comments demanded it, let's check in on Meghan McCain. In case you didn't know, she's the daughter of the late Senator John McCain, and boasts the inflated self-importance of the daughter of two-term President John McCain.

Senator Cory Booker was today's unfortunate political guest on "The View." Megs complimented him on his even-tempered, highly civil, bipartisan acceptance that Republicans would never let him do anything as president.

MCCAIN: One of the things that I liked that you have said is that 'Medicare For All' is unrealistic right now, given that it will never pass.

Damn right! It's "unrealistic" to advocate for anything Republican donors don't like. Democrats shouldn't even put on underwear because Republicans will just give them wedgies. Going commando is the consensus choice.

But there's trouble in paradise. Booker still has remnants of a human spine. He thinks it's "defeatist" for Democrats to let the gun lobby control the narrative on gun safety. He supports an assault weapon ban, as well as a buyback program and mandatory turnover. McCain doesn't want big government interfering with her constitutional right to get wasted on Jell-O shots and shoot hobos guns on her property.

MCCAIN: You do support mandatory gun buybacks. When I heard you and Beto saying that, to me, that's like a left-wing fever dream.

Beto O'Rourke's a former congressman and presidential candidate, and McCain is using his first name like they were in band together. Who does the Duchess of Arizona think she ... oh right.

We're impressed with Megs's interviewing skills: Just keep sniping "GUN BUYBACKS" while Cory Booker tries to make a point about not being a dick. We're sure that taught him something.

What makes sensible gun legislation a "fever dream" in what passes for McCain's mind is that red state He-Men like her brother are never going to give up their penis substitutes. They will defy the law -- violently, in fact -- so we should not bother passing any laws that these American patriots don't like. These are the same people who insist we build WALL to protect our border.

Booker patiently pointed out that we managed to peacefully get machine guns off the streets, but McCain kept insisting that her brother just won't tolerate any new gun laws. It's a good thing we don't pass legislation based solely on its support from the key Meghan McCain's Brother demographic.

MCCAIN: Just tell me semantically, how you're going to get my brother's gun back. So you're going to go to my brother's house? My brother won't do it.

I think we can all agree that McCain's brother shouldn't have a gun. McCain's pitching a remake of Not Without My Daughter but instead of a daughter, it's an overgrown child's AR-15.

When Booker tried to distinguish his position from O'Rourke's, McCain interrupted to call O'Rourke "crazy" because he disagrees with her on a specific policy. It's also worth pointing out that Beto isn't the one drunk shooting in the "crick." Booker gently chided her like the spoiled child she is. Booker did his best Fred Rogers and said we should "watch how we talk about people" and you shouldn't attack someone's character. Can you say "character"? What followed was a vintage 1984 Megs McCabe whine from the Entitled White Lady Vineyards.

MCCAIN: He has no problem doing it to me! He was very nasty to me about this!

Beto O'Rourke was "nasty" to Meghan McCain? We would like to see that! To the Google!

The former Texas congressman [...] said he was disheartened by commentary from, among others, Meghan McCain, warning that forcing Americans to sell their assault rifles would prompt violence.

"I just I think that kind of language and rhetoric is not helpful. [...] It becomes self-fulfilling; you have people on TV who are almost giving you permission to be violent and saying, 'You know this is this is going to happen.'"

O'Rourke brought up McCain's name unprompted after "The View" host had said, earlier this week, that an attempt by the government to compel AR-15 owners to sell back their weapons would prompt "a lot of violence."

"When someone says, "If you do this, then this will happen," O'Rourke said, "almost as though that's a natural response or maybe even something that should happen or deserves to happen. When I think the response should be, 'We're doing nothing now and we're seeing people slaughtered in their schools, at work, at a Walmart, in a synagogue, in a church, at a concert. There is violence right now and it is horrifying and it is terrifying and it is terrorizing.'.... We should be worried about that kind of violence right now."

Sometimes we forget we like Beto too.

In our fact-based reality, O'Rourke said it wasn't "helpful" to suggest, as McCain has, that it's a perfectly normal and rational response for Americans to respond with armed violence when the gun grabbers come calling. It's especially disgusting because the implication is these gun lovers would mow down police officers. The government wouldn't just send disposable hippies to confiscate the assault weapons.

BOOKER: You both know that just because somebody does something to us, doesn't mean you...

MCCAIN: I'm not running for president!

Thank God.

MCCAIN: With all due respect, and the way he talks about me inciting violence on this, I take very seriously and I speak for a lot of red state Americans, whether he or you like it or not, there is a lot of Republicans you have to win over.

Oh, stop it. A lot of minorities and liberals of all races live in red states. The wealthy daughter of a senator and beer heiress doesn't speak for them. She doesn't really speak for the broke-ass white people in red states. McCain promotes herself as the representative of the average, red state resident, but she probably doesn't even converse with them when they're serving her drinks.

When Barack Obama spanked Mitt Romney in 2012, he carried only 39 percent of the white vote and "won over" just 6 percent of Republicans. He even lost the independents that pundits claim are so important. But Obama dominated among Democrats, who turned out in greater numbers.

Beto O'Rourke isn't "crazy." The "crazy" Democrats are the ones trying to court Meghan McCain. She's Lucy with the football in Cruella's dalmatian coat.

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. Once, he wrote a novel called “Mahogany Slade,” which you should read or at least buy. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."


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