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Hi Meghan!


Hi, Meghan McCain, what's makin' a ruckus between your dumb ears today? You're so excited about how Ted Cruz tapped Carly Fiorina to be his "running mate" in the presidential race he's really not a viable contender in anymore? Tell us your thoughts, girl:

I love Carly Fiorina. ... She's still to me of any candidate running, has gone after Hillary Clinton the hardest. She rips out her jugular and serves it to me on a platter.

GRRRR MEGHAN THIRSTY FOR HILLARY CLINTON'S BLOOD, LIKE IT SO MUCH WHEN CARLY FIORINA PULL OUT BIG VAGINA AND DESTROY MUCH SMALLER HILLARY VAGINA.

[wonkbar]<a href="http://wonkette.com/598609/carly-fiorina-says-shes-losing-because-everyones-afraid-of-her-yeah-thats-it"></a>[/wonkbar]Factcheck: Hillary Clinton is on track to win the Democratic nomination, whereas Carly Fiorina was one of the last loser kid's table Republicans to drop out of the Republican primary. So we guess Carly did no actual ripping of any sort of jugulars. Oh, she tried, but it was fucking pathetic just like her tenure at Hewlett-Packard.

Say more ass poots with your mouth hole, Meghan:

What I like about Carly Fiorina is she warms up Ted Cruz. [...]

When she was singing yesterday and talking about how she sings this song? With Ted Cruz's daughters? I mean, Ted Cruz is not the warmest politician in the history of the world, and the implication that she’s like hanging out with his family on the bus and they're like singing together, it’s quite a juxtaposition from what I imagine is happening to Donald Trump on his campaign bus?

[wonkbar]<a href="http://wonkette.com/601172/lying-liar-carly-fiorina-already-lying-for-running-mate-ted-cruz"></a>[/wonkbar]Fucking gross, Meghan. Now we're supposed to sit here thinking about how Cuddly Sweet Mommy Carly Fiorina, who loves puppies and sings creepy songs really slowly to Ted Cruz's children, warms him up. Ted Cruz has the cold Lucifer skin, whereas Carly's persona is piping hot and wet and sweet and, when she's not FUCKING LYING CONSTANTLY or ripping out Hillary's veins, she's endearing and gentle.

BRB, vomiting.

One more question for Meghan: Will Ted Cruz's little Hail Carly pass save his campaign and he can be preznit now?

Choosing a female running mate, I know better than anybody else, doesn't always work ...

HAHAHA, actually we think Meghan's dad, JOHN MCCAIN, knows better than anybody else that when you pick an asshole conservative lady idiot to be your running mate, things don't necessary go well.

But LOL whatever, we're glad Meghan's got this platform at Fox News where she can tell us about all the starbursts in her pants and the tingles in her legs about Carly Fiorina, things she would otherwise just write in glue and glitter in her bedazzled Trapper Keeper under the heading "Meghan + Carly 4-Ever!!!!"

[RawStory]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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