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This is my EMPATHY FACE!


You can take the blonde out of Fox, but you can't take the Fox out of the blonde. Here's Megyn Kelly wondering if rich, white ladies like herself will be going back to Starbucks now that it's going to quit arresting those icky black homeless people for the crime of existing in Privilege Land.

For the paying customers who go in with their kids, do you really want to deal with a mass of homeless people or whoever is in there — could be drug addicted, you don’t know when you’re there with your kids paying for the services of the place.

How you livin' Andy Lack? Still feeling good about your decision to dump Tamron Hall and Al Roker and give their salaries to Fox's meanest Mean Girl?

Because Megyn Kelly is so good at talking about race, the producers set up a segment discussing last month's viral video of police arresting a group of black men for sitting in the chairs at Starbucks before they'd ordered any coffee. They were waiting for a friend like normal people with manners. Or as Megyn Kelly put it,

You know there was this dust up not long ago. Two African-American men came into a Starbucks in Philadelphia. And you're supposed to buy something there if you want to sit in a Starbucks or use the restroom. And they didn't.

Are we pretending those "two African-American men" were homeless dudes who never intended to order anything?

All right, they didn't buy anything. But was it really cause for calling the cops?

WE ARE! And congratulations, Megyn, for turning a conversation about racial bias into a chance to crap on the poor. Girlfriend works hard to earn that Red Scrunchie, today and every day!

Jenna Bush Hager pointed out that there aren't that many spaces for homeless people to take shelter during the day. So maybe don't be an asshole!

I see the other side of it. I think some of these people don't have places to go... Of course it's not a solution, but it's also compassionate.

The entire audience applauded, which was Megyn's cue to swoop in and let them all know that she does not want to look at those people while she's sipping her pumpkin spice latte and pretending that six dollar milkshake she just bought her kid is some kind of coffee beverage. Because Megyn is A PROFESSIONAL.

I feel like there are places. Like in New York City, they're pretty good about providing churches for the homeless to go and get meals and so on. And there's a question about whether a commercial establishment is that place.

Yeah, Kevin Johnson! Have you, the CEO of Starbucks, considered Megyn Kelly's expert opinion that it's wrong to let poor people come inside out of the rain without forking over five bucks for a mocha latte? And while she's dispensing #WISDOM, Kelly is also worried that Starbucks' implicit bias training is bad. Not because she supports racism, perish the thought! But you see, they've hired that rap fellow Common. And years ago he said some homophobic and misogynistic lyrics. Ipso facto, NO BIAS! NO BIAS! COMMON IS THE BIAS!

I’m just saying, you know, if we’re going to hold up somebody as an example to teach on bias, maybe we should be sensitive to that person’s entire record.

We are old enough to remember when Megyn Kelly insisted Santa couldn't possibly be black. We are old enough to remember her flogging that bullshit about the New Black Panther Party to scare the crap out of aging white people and boost her ratings. We are old enough to remember her justifying a cop beating a black 14-year-old girl in a bathing suit because, "that girl was no saint." We are old enough to remember this morning when Kelly pretended a couple of black, middle-class real estate guys waiting for their buddy at Starbucks were homeless people camped out there all day. So maybe Megyn's producers would like to prep her a little more thoroughly for these chats about race. We are just saying.

Anyway! Great job, NBC. Your ratings are down 18 percent, your costs are up, and you're saddled with a morning host who is literally incapable of being nice. This is all going to turn around any second now ... any second.

TWENTY. THREE. MILLION. DOLLARS. PER. YEAR.

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Please click here to fund us! We tried to get NBC to dump some cash on us, but we weren't mean enough to make the cut. SAD.

[Raw Story / WSJ]

Five Dollar Feminist

Your FDF lives in Baltimore under an assumed identity as an upstanding member of the PTA. Shhh, don't tell anyone she makes swears on the internet!

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Photo by Wonkette operative 'Zippy W. Spincycle'

Last week, Yr Dok Zoom talked a little bit about his damn dissertation, which looked at "Wabbit Literacy," the weird thing where we sometimes learn about the world from parodies and jokes long before we ever encounter the original stuff -- like learning about opera from cartoons. More than one person in the comments (which Wonkette does not allow and yet, like life, you find a way) mentioned they were disappointed, as kids, to learn that while roadrunners are real birds, the actual critter looks nothing like this:

Which is not to say that real roadrunners are the least bit disappointing, as animals go, because they're freaking incredible. Yes, even if they don't actually leave lines of flame down the center line of desert highways and go "Meep! Meep!" But they can sprint up to 20 miles per hour, which is faster than you, albeit slower than a real coyote's top speed. Also, yes, real coyotes are among the predators what eat roadrunners, which is why the wily birds adopted the evolutionary strategy of running right through fake tunnels coyotes paint on the sides of mountains.

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Once upon a time... about ten years ago, a group of entirely ridiculous men burst onto the scene wearing stupid hats and telling men that wearing stupid hats and telling men that walking up to women in bars and insulting ("negging") them would get them laid. This did not last long, as women also had televisions and computers and were completely aware of these tricks as well, so when some ass came up to us in a bar and said "Hey, nice nails, are they real?" we would laugh and laugh and loudly announce "Oh my god, this guy just tried to neg me! Can you believe that shit? HEY EVERYONE, THIS GUY JUST TRIED TO NEG ME!" and then refer to him as "Mystery" the whole night.

Most of the men who tried that shit only did so a few times before realizing that it wasn't going to work, and thus moved on to other things. Perhaps things that did not involve furry hats and coming off as a huge creep. We may never know, because I would assume that those who tried it are now extremely embarrassed and would never, ever admit to this to us.

Still, there were a few men willing to eat that shit up, as well as some grifters willing to take advantage of that. Said grifters tended to be extremely misogynistic and seemed more like they were teaching men how to be as despised by women as they were than teaching them how to actually be liked by women.

Some of them, like Roosh V, a creepy weirdo who actually does live in his mom's basement, actively encouraged men to rape women who were intoxicated to the point of being obviously unable to consent.

However, even that branch of the PUA tree is wilting away. Many "self-help" style PUA forums like Nextasf and RSDnation are shutting down or have already shut down. In March, Chateau Heartiste, a batshit crazy PUA turned White Nationalist/Alt-Right blog was shut down by Wordpress. This week, rape advocate Roosh V (whom you may recall once called yours truly a "Wonkette typist/clown face, would not bang") announced that he was renouncing his PUA ways and devoting himself to Jesus. He explained to the forum he manages that he would no longer be allowing anyone to discuss premarital "fornication."

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