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Mercenary Trump Supporter Bruce Carter Now Officially Most Embarrassing Black Person Alive

Elections

Sunken Place Resident and Former Trump Campaign Stooge Bruce Carter


Political hacktivist Bruce Carter wins this year's Profile in Shame after Bloomberg revealed he was a dunce, dope, and a sucker in the Trump campaign's supervillain evil attempts to suppress the black vote.

Breitbart News landed an election scoop that went viral in August 2016: “Exclusive: ‘Black Men for Bernie’ Founder to End Democrat ‘Political Slavery’ of Minority Voters… by Campaigning for Trump.”

If the splashy, counterintuitive story, which circulated on such conservative websites as Truthfeed and Infowars, wasn't exactly fake news, it was carefully orchestrated.

The story’s writer—an employee of the conservative website run by Steve Bannon before he took over Donald Trump’s campaign—spent weeks courting activist Bruce Carter to join Trump’s cause. He approached Carter under the guise of interviewing him. The writer eventually dropped the pretense altogether, signing Carter up for a 10-week blitz aimed at convincing black voters in key states to support the Republican real estate mogul, or simply sit out the election. Trump’s narrow path to victory tightened further if Hillary Clinton could attract a Barack Obama-level turnout.

Let's be clear: This has nothing to do with Bernie Sanders or the DNC or anything else that might explode the comments section. This is about Carter being so Diamond and Silk dumb that he ignored the obvious odor of sulphur in the room when meeting someone from Breitbart and agreed to help Donald Trump's presidential ambitions, which were symbolically equivalent to kicking black people in the face repeatedly with a steel-toed boot.

(Also, real quick side-note! Wonkette may be partisan commie liberal scum, and yet we still have never secretly organized campaign operatives and funneled money to 'em. We must be slipping.)

Of course, persuading black people to support in any significant numbers Donald Trump, who did this and said this, is impossible without the mind control powers of David Tennant's character from Jessica Jones.

So, the more realistic goal was to demoralize black voters with a shock-and-awe assault of racial nihilism and have them sit out the election. This is the exact opposite of everything Martin Luther King did. No black man should have the position of "Bizarro Martin Luther King" on their resume.

“If you can’t stomach Trump, just don’t vote for the other people and don’t vote at all,” Carter, 47, recalls telling black voters. It’s the message he says the Trump campaign wanted him to deliver. “That’s what they wanted, that’s what they got.”

The work Carter says he did, and the funds he was given to do it, also raise questions as to whether campaign finance laws were broken.

Narrator: We're guessing they were.

The group Carter founded, Trump for Urban Communities, never disclosed its spending to the Federal Election Commission—a possible violation of election law. In hindsight, Carter says, he believed he was working for the campaign so he wouldn’t have been responsible for reporting the spending.

His descriptions of the operation suggest possible coordination between Trump’s campaign and his nominally independent efforts. If there was coordination, election law dictates that any contributions to groups such as his must fall within individual limits: no more than $2,700 for a candidate. One supporter far exceeded that cap, giving about $100,000 to Carter’s efforts.

Yeah, so he's going to jail. Whiter men than he have fallen in the wake of Trump's corruption. But they at least had their dignity and self-respect... kinda. Carter wasn't even able to parlay his tap-dancing minstrelsy into a prominent White House position that no one could ever possibly live to regret. And a year after Trump's election, Carter was still doing his best Samuel L. Jackson from Django Unchained and insisting that Melanie's husband was the "greatest thing that happened for urban communities and Black voters." What does he have to show for it all? He's already been disinvited to every black cookout across the country, which is its own form of prison. I hope he enjoys his life sentence of unseasoned over-raisined potato salad.

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Seattle. However, he's more reliable for food and drink recommendations in Portland, where he spends a lot of time for theatre work. His co-adaptation of "Jitterbug Perfume" by Tom Robbins is playing NOW at Pioneer Square's Cafe Nordo. All Wonketters welcome.

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FINALLY. Of course, we say "finally," because we haven't been behind the scenes in the House Judiciary and Intelligence committees to witness the negotiating and wrangling firsthand, so we don't know what it's taken to make this happen, but clear your calendars for July 17, because Bobby Mueller is goin' to Congress!

Committee chairs Adam Schiff and Jerry Nadler sent the letter late yesterday, accompanied by a subpoena, for Mueller to testify at 9 a.m. Eastern on July 17, which is a Wednesday, so you will presumably not be busy with brunch. The hearings for each committee will be back to back, after which members of Mueller's staff will meet with committee staff behind closed doors.

Schiff told Rachel Maddow last night that it should not be viewed as a friendly subpoena, because as we all know, Mueller has been very reluctant to become the star of the political circus this will surely create. However, he's gonna have to suck it up, because as we all saw after what happened when Mueller addressed the nation for 10 whole minutes, there is great value in actually having Mueller breathe life into his own work, for an American audience that hasn't read his 448-page report. (And we don't blame them/you! We probably wouldn't have read it all if it wasn't our job. It would probably be on our "list," like "someday I am going to watch 'The Sopranos' start to finish finally. And then I will read the Mueller Report!")

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Right off the bat, we have a couple of questions:

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