Do police understand non-lethal technology, or are they flummoxed by machines that don't go PEW PEW? Every single day another officer of the law gets outed on social media for beating the crap out of some poor brown kid. And yet cops go right on posting incriminating shit all over Facebook. They'll come to your kid's school and lecture little Tyler and Tiffany about online safety. But once they peel out of the parking lot, it's SUN'S OUT GUNS OUT.


Hey there, Stevo! Oh, sorry to be familiar, Detective Steven Rosser. But we feel like we know you, what with your now-deleted Facebook posts appearing in our Twitter feed. Didn't you just tell little Chloe and Jacob that stuff you post online is FOREVER?



It's nice to know that you're so politically engaged. But it does make us wonder if it was just a coincidence that you and three fellow officers happened to be working undercover in the Sirens strip club on Wednesday night when Trump-accuser Stormy Daniels was doing her act and got arrested. Because there's what you said yesterday.


And there's what you said in February about poor President Trump, beset by a "hostile Congress and the media attacking him 24/7." (Was that before or after you told little Jayden, Braeden and Caden not to send naked selfies to their friends?)


And there's what Daniels's lawyer Avenatti said ...

Right before the Columbus Police Department magically dropped the case.

UH HUH.

Look, the point of all these pretty pictures is that the power is in your hands, Wonkers. Literally. Are you reading this on your phone? Then you have the power to make the world a better place. Especially if you're a person protected by your skin, or your bank account, or your zip code.

Because we can't all have Michael Avenatti shining a spotlight on our police problems.

But we can all use social media to look out for each other. So if you see something, film something. Take a screenshot and mail it to yourself. Maybe next week you'll find that someone in your community needs help.

Social media's a sewer, but none of us seems to be able to quit swimming in it. Might as well use it to fight racists and Trump supporters. But we repeat ourselves!

Jack and Mark are gonna steal all your data anyway, right?



Happy clicking! And don't be an asshole.

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Liz Dye

Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.

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