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Hello friends! YourOccupy Wall Street correspondent spent the day familiarizing himself with the park-dwelling lifestyle (pro tip: poop at McDonald's, not in your pants) and meeting the treacherous peaceniks that he will be spending an entire week with. Did you know that these "disorganized, godless pixies" are actually extremely intelligent and highly organized, and that they have a kitchen that serves three meals a day and a medical station that offers free medical assistance and a library with free book-learnin'? (A place where you can borrow books for reading, but no Netflix overnight shipping depot? Ha ha, just another example of "pantomime progressivism"!) Anyway, nobody got arrested today (as of 8:30pm), but there were lots of hot celebrities such as Michael Moore. And the Granny Peace Squad came and helped ruin America with us. You probably already know about the Granny Peace Squad, but are you familiar with Michael Moore? He is an old woman who wears a trashbag and talks smack about the 5-0. Videos after the jump!


Here are some righteous elders (the self-described "Granny Peace Squad") telling a Fox News teevee crew that they're not afraid of getting curb-stomped by the cops, even though they're very fragile:

Oh right, and then Michael Moore showed up. And a bunch of cops. And everyone went bonkers:

Okay our computer is about to explode, from lack of batteries, so we will sign off for now. During the night hours before Tuesday dawn, we will document the process known as "sleeping on your mother's yoga mat in a park full of Bohemians."

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Florida's hand-counting of ballots is underway, and for all the Republican whining about Democrats trying to "steal" the elections for US Senate and governor (and floating insane conspiracy theories while they're at it), the recounts appear on track to confirm the results initially reported on election night: Florida's new governor will probably be Republican Rick DeSantis, and current governor and Voldemort impersonator Rick Scott will probably replace Democrat Bill Nelson in the US Senate. That doesn't necessarily mean anything is really settled, of course, because it's fucking Florida.

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Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez's first days in Congress have been a doozie. She's been "mistaken" for an intern or a spouse on multiple occasions, everyone's making up pretend fights that she's getting in with people she's not actually getting into fights with, and she's still somehow not performing poverty well enough to convince Fox News and other conservatives that she is not a secret billionaire.

On Wednesday, Fox News published an exposé on AOC and her vast riches -- showing that even though she said that it was going to be tough to afford an apartment in DC for the three months before she'd receive a salary, she was actually a fifteen thousandaire.

If she converted that $15K into pennies, she could probably swim in them, just like her fellow rich person Scrooge McDuck.

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