Michele Bachmann Also Obviously Huge Pill Popper, Constantly Suffers 'Episodes'
So everybody remembers how Michele Bachmann is known torun away from other people screaming? This is apparently totally normal "Michele" behavior, who'd have guessed! Conservative gossip tabloid The Daily Callergot the dirt from three anonymous people "close to Bachmann" saying she gobbles pills all day long, has, uh, "episodes" and mysterious insane "headaches" that require hospitalization when she gets stressed out, all of which she blames on those constant communications from outerspace wearing high heels. All of this sounds so predictably close to the cartoonish vision of Michele Bachmann that most sane people already entertain when they think of this harpie dingbat that we are asking, is this really news? Oh right, she wants to be president.
Bachmann’s medical condition wouldn’t merit public attention, but for the fact she is running for president. Some close to Bachmann fear she won’t be equal to the stress of the campaign, much less the presidency itself.
“When she gets ‘em, frankly, she can’t function at all. It’s not like a little thing with a couple Advils. It’s bad,” the adviser says. “The migraines are so bad and so intense, she carries and takes all sorts of pills. Prevention pills. Pills during the migraine. Pills after the migraine, to keep them under control. She has to take these pills wherever she goes.”
To staff, Bachmann has implausibly blamed the headaches on uncomfortable high-heel shoes, but those who have worked closely with her cite stress, a busy schedule and anything going badly for Bachmann as causes.
So there you have it, your second Michele Bachmann post of the day, because Michele Bachmann is so certifiably insane that your humorously nihilistic news media cannot resist reminding everyone as often as possible how terrifying this woman's presidency would look. [TheDC]