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Now here's the story, about some deplorable white guys....


This week is going to be a little different! Instead of giving you a bunch of boring details, maps, and statistics about House races in flyover country, we're going across the country to highlight all the white supremacists running for congress. These are not your average pro-Trump MAGA creepers, they're actual white supremacists and Nazis, and their eligible to run for public office. Hurray, democracy!

John Abarr

He's not part of the KKK anymore, he's just a white nationalist.

John Abarr is a former Republican running for Montana's HD 21, a rectangular sliver in Northeastern Great Falls. Abarr is famous for starting the Rocky Mountain Knights, which he called the "new Klan," and it was far, far worse than New Coke. Abarr told local papers that his Kool Klux Klan was more of social club to fight the new world order, so he was swallowing his white pride and letting in the Jews, the gays, even black and brown people! Needless to say, the actual KKK was not happy, but Abarr really had the courage of his convictions.

Abarr has since apologized and tried to clean up his ghostly image with a half-assed apology. He says he was never actually a cross burning lynch leader in ratty bed sheets, he just really loved the attention he got from "psychological terrorism."

Emphasis obviously ours.

Despite having previously run for congress as a Republican, Abarr claims he found Jesus and is now a Democrat (since nobody would vote for the American Freedom Party). Abarr's platform is mostly suicide prevention, gun fetishism, white pride, and uniting "Right Wing Democrats with Right Wing Republicans." Abarr feels that his primary opponent, Leesha Ford, a nurse and a teacher, is "too nice and compassionate" and would "rather go to Africa..."

On his blog, Abarr says that "groping is no big deal," David Duke isn't a "bad guy," and he professes his support for the Pace Amendment, which basically says nobody should be a citizen unless they have pure, "white blood."

[Donate to Leesha Ford!]

Sean Donahue

WARNING: Don't park you taco truck on his lawn!

Sean Donahue WAS running in the Republican primary for the Pennsylvania 11th district, but the governor and state Supreme Court told the GOP to fuck off up gerrymandered mountain. We honestly don't even know if Donahue is still an eligible candidate as the MS-Paint petition begging for help on his Facebook page is two months old. For safety sake, we're going to assume he's still running.

This district used to be run by racist Rep. Lou Barletta, but he's challenging Sen. Bob Casey Jr. Donahue is not a fan of Barletta as he feels Barletta betrayed "white voters" after he failed to kick all the immigrants out of Hazleton, PA. He's legit terrified that ice cream trucks will melt into big, gay taco trucks, and he rants about it endlessly in a plethora of Facebook videos. He's all about "guns, God, liberty and nationalism."

No stranger to the community, Donahue ran for mayor of Hazleton on the American Freedom Party ticket in 2016, and was also convicted on two counts of harassment for sending hundreds of emails to state employees after being denied a job. Last year he was convicted on a misdemeanor count of making terroristic threats against Luzerne County District Attorney Stefanie Salavantis back in 2012. Donahue was pissed that local cops didn't point him to the unemployment line, so he emailed Salavantis and said he intended to, "prepare [himself] to face off against a police firing line."

Sean Donahue honestly believes this...

Aside from believing that Antifa and Black Lives Matter are stockpiling weapons and waiting for Obama's orders, Donahue has a hilarious list of 12 Amendments that would, amongst other things, offer black people $25,000 to be deported to Liberia, bestow veterans with "nobility," make sovereign citizenry a real thing, and literally separate the US from Mexico with a 100 mile water barrier. He also proposes banning gay cakes, gun laws, and equal rights. There's also some weird legal gripe about teddy bears buried at the bottom of his shitty web page, but we gave up trying to figure it out.

Oddly enough, Donahue is too toxic for other Republicans. He was invited to a debate by the Dauphin County Council of Republican Women, but one candidate, a pro-Trump Republican, refused to share a stage with Donahue due to his “anti-Semitic, pro-segregationist, and white-supremacist views and values." He even managed to shame the other candidates into bailing out. Imagine that!

Donahue is hoping to unseat Democratic Rep. Matt Cartwright. Trump won this area by 10 points, and the current political map suggests Cartwright will have a tough fight ahead of him. The primary here is May 15, and there are three other Republican primary opponents.

[Donate to Rep. Matt Cartwright!]

Paul Nehlen

Do you think he keeps a picture of Strom Thurmond in his wallet?

One of the original pariahs of the "alt-right," Paul Nehlen could be considered the arch-nemesis of Paul Ryan were it not for Ryan's war on the poor. Nehlen miserably failed to usurp Ryan back in 2016, but now that Ryan is retiring after pickpocketing the huddled masses, there's a chance Nehlen could cinch the Republican nomination in the Wisconsin 1st.

Nehlen has been skulking about white power circles for years. He used to write for Breitbart, and they endorsed his campaign against Ryan in 2016. About a year later they denounced him after he stopped being a normal Islamophobic gun-humping crackpot and came out of the closet as a Red Pill-pushing anti-Semite who might actually want his critics to "eat a bullet." You know, because they're all JJEEWWZZ.

Nehlen has campaigned for ALLEGED pedophile Roy Moore, and appeared on David Duke's podcast where the two kvetched about goyim being excluded from HaShem's media empire. Nehlen has since been banished to the Internet's Netherworld with the rest of the white supremacists on anti-social media, and the Wisconsin Republican party has returned his dues and declared, "Nehlen and his ideas have no place in the Republican Party."

Unsurprisingly, Nehlen's platform looks like the back of a cocktail napkin after a night of heavy drinking with Ayn Rand, Alan Greenspan, and Hitler. His whole campaign is based on the extrajudicial deportation of undocumented immigrants, building Trump's wall from sea to shining sea, and stopping cash from trickling down to the poor. According to him, a woman's place is in the kitchen or on her back making more white babies, so no abortions for you little harlots!

Right now Nehlen's primary challenger is Nick Polce, a rejected clone of Paul Ryan. On the left are Randy "Iron Stache" Bryce, and the inspirational Cathy Myers. The primary here isn't until August, but Nehlen's built a sizeable warchest of neo-Nazi gold in comparison to Polce. It's likely that Myers or Bryce would crush Nehlen in the general, but we'd rather not leave anything to chance due to Wisconsin's voter ID laws.

[Donate to Randy "Iron Stache" Bryce!]

[Donate to Cathy Myers!]

Find Wisconsin voter registration info here!

Arthur Jones

Arthur Jones, he's not a "Nazi" (anymore).

Finally we have Arthur Jones, an actual Nazi and the Republican nominee for the Illinois 3rd. While all the other candidates flirt with Nazism or blow their Swastika slidewhitles, Jones is the only candidate who openly parades around in a Nazi uniform and denies the Holocaust.

Jones has long been on the radar of many anti-hate groups. He's long called the holocaust an "international extortion racket," and his campaign website features anti-semitic flyers that he encourages people to pass out. There's even an entire section on flags, where calls the Confederate flag a "symbol of white pride," and rails against Africa and Israel. On his blog, Jones rants about the plight of "white patriots" in Charlottesville; that "bubble-brained Bolsheviks" attacked the murderer of Heather Hyer, and in a panic, he drove into a crowd of unarmed protesters.

Aside from all the anti-gay, anti-semitic, and anti-immigrant garbage on his Geocities-era website, Jones posts photos of clippings from the American Free Press, a neo-Nazi "newspaper."

Back in February, Jones went on CNN to bitch about the "accursed two party, Jew party, queer party system," then reminded everyone that he's a patriot who was in Vietnam.

Jones is no stranger to politics. He ran for mayor of Milwaukee in 1976, for Chicago alderman back in 1987, and he's made over half-a-dozen runs for the House since the 1990s. But to say that Jones "won" the Republican nomination is a bit unfair as Jones ran unopposed in the Republican primary, guaranteeing him the nomination. We should note that the Illinois Republican party has denounced and derided Jones.

The Third is a reliably Democratic district, and Rep. Dan Lipinski is the regrettable blue dog incumbent here. Without going into the weeds, Lipinski is the booger eater your mom makes you invite to the party who inevitably vomits chocolate ice cream all over the furniture. In this case your mom is the local labor union, and the furniture is abortion rights.

Though we may point and laugh at these people, the bottom line is that they they aren't alone. For decades, conservatives have winked and nudged at political fringe groups, and it's only with the election of Donald Trump that they've felt emboldened to slither out from the shadows. They are routinely dismissed as cranks, hacks, and denounced by major parties, but they only need to win an election. Voter turnouts over the last century rarely top 60 percent, despite the warnings from political junkies and news nerds. Now, conservatives are clinging to power by disenfranchising voters with voter ID laws, gerrymandering, and fear mongering. It's our hope that you'll share these types of stories so that people can make informed decisions when they go into voting booths.

We're 100% ad-free and reader supported, buy us a cup of coffee so we can keep an eye on all these damn Nazis.

[ Great Falls Tribune / Helena Independent Record / HuffPo / The Nation / Citizens' Voice / FOX News / NY Times / Ballotpedia / Statistical Atlas / Milwaukee Journal Sentinel / NPR Chicago Sun-Times / CNN / SPLC / PBS / Election Project]

Dominic Gwinn

Dominic is a broke journalist in Chicago. You can find him in a dirty bar talking to weirdos, or lying in a gutter taking photos.

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