Donate

Mitch McConnell Has New Enemy No. One: Smokey The Bear

News

Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell has been mumbling a lot of SCIENCE about how the dumb president will not do Mitch McConnell's job for him by finding a trillion dollars in spending cuts that would meet Mitch McConnell's approval. So everyone was like "why don't YOU propose the spending cuts, Mitch McConnell?" but Mitch McConnell was like "NO," because all spending cuts except foreign aid are incredibly unpopular with the American people! But finally -- finally -- Mitch McConnell has explained how he caneliminate our nasty old debt without raising taxes. And that is by FUCK YOU SMOKEY THE BEAR.


Meet this Smokey the Bear hot air balloon that flies around New Mexico reminding people not to burn down the whole goddamn country, because wildfires are bad for children and other living things, or are wildly costly or something.

Since 2005, the National Forest Service has chipped in nearly $240,000 to help pay for balloon costs and appearances. Chapel says that's a small part of the Friends of the Smokey Bear Balloon's approximately $200,000 a year budget.

But not small enough for Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R - KY). Today at the opening day of a new Senate, he called out the Smokey Bear Balloon as a waste of taxpayer dollars.

"If we can't stop spending taxpayer dollars on robo-squirrels, and dancing robot DJ's or hot air balloon rides for Smokey the Bear, then there's no hope at all," McConnell said. "If we can't fix the easy stuff... how are we ever going to get at the hard stuff?"

In seven years they spent $240,000 on a BALLOON? That is over $30,000 a year! Why, if you just combine that with defunding Planned Parenthood, the EPA, the NEA, the Department of Education, and the entire government, you have eliminated our deficit AND our debt, so suck it libtards, it is called "math" and you should try it.

[KRQE]

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

$
Donate with CC

And now for some very serious TUT TUTTING! It's time again for Republicans to make sad words about President Treason McTraitorpants selling out the country. This time they are seriously concerned, nay even deeply troubled, that Donald Trump would stand next to Vladimir Putin and pretend the Russians didn't hack the 2016 election. These patriotic Republicans are shocked, SHOCKED! Well, not, like, upset enough to do anything about it -- not with a fascist carpooler to jam into the Supreme Court. But they've got tweets, so it's all good!

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC

Republicans are in a pickle. Midterms are coming up and the party in the White House usually loses seats in those elections. It doesn't help their chances that their guy Donald Trump frolics through fields holding hands with self-made Russian dictator and coincidental poisoner Vladimir Putin, who our own justice department believes attacked our mostly free elections and our true national monument, the Internet.

If you're as old as I am, you'll recall that back in the 1980s, the whole Republican brand involved not trusting the Ruskies, and they were especially disappointed when Kevin Costner turned out to be one in No Way Out. Now, the current Republican president is talking like some kind of crazy commie lib, bashing the FBI and giving the benefit of the doubt to a former KGB agent. During an interview Sunday where he wore a hat with "USA" in big letters on it, presumably so someone could easily return him if he got lost on the field trip, Trump went so far as to call the European Union a "foe" of his country, which if you believe his hat is supposedly the United States not Russia.

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC
Donate

SINGLE & MONTHLY DONATIONS

SUPPORT THE CAUSE - PAYPAL DONATION

PAYPAL RECURRING DONATIONS

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc