There are literally tens of reasons for you to clicky clicky these Happy Nice Time links this afternoon, all of which have to do with making sure people give us monies, so get going, please.
Why not start with Tim Tebow looking as swollen and masculine and ridiculous as can be, for Jesus?
We've got a great book review of a fun little beach read of a book, Swastika Nation: Fritz Kuhn and the Rise and Fall of the German-American Bund.
Soon Google will robot drone you to death, but it will be cool because you'll be able to shop easier or you will also be a drone robot. Whatevs.
We recapped Cosmos at you because we understand smart science stuff as good as the next not-science people.
Both Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert are back from vacation, thank God, and Stewart tackled the Bundy Ranch while Colbert mocked the Hillary shoe-throwing conspiracy theorists.
There are so many ways Time Warner can screw you, and we'll tell you about a whole new way!
And last but never least, we've got an after school special starring sideboob .
The bartender says "What will you have?"
Jesus says "Nothing, thanks. I make my own wine."
The Nazi says "I'll have a 'Stormtrooper.'"
Google says "Your bar."
Alas, she will <a href="http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0034409\/" target="_blank">never get rich</a>.