New York Tyrant Mayor Michael Bloomberg Joins 'Dangerous Kooks Sent Me Poison, For Freedom' Club
Well, let's see who's getting letters stuffed with poison this week! Thenewest inductee in the House of the Ricin Sons is New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg, who was sent two letters containing a "pink-orange oily substance," according to New York deputy police commissioner Paul Browne on Wednesday. The substance tested positive for trace amounts of ricin, the trendiest homemade toxin of 2013. Oh, and as we were typing this piece, we also learned of yet another maybe-ricin letter sent to President Obama and intercepted by the Secret Service.
We have pretty much had it with this ricin fad. It's worse than "planking" and "Gangnam Style" combined.
And was there a specific message that the sender of the letter wanted Mayor Bloomberg to give some consideration to? Why, yes! Yes there was!
Browne said the letters to Bloomberg contained a threat to the mayor and mentioned the debate on gun laws.
"The letter obviously, referred to our anti-gun efforts but there's 12,000 people (who) are going to get killed this year with guns and 19,000 that are going to commit suicide with guns, and we're not going to walk away from those efforts," Bloomberg said.
One of the letters was addressed to the mayor's office and opened by workers at a city facility last Friday; emergency responders who touched the letter "were examined after they showed minor intestinal symptoms of ricin exposure," which eventually subsided. The other letter went to Mayors Against Illegal Guns, which Bloomberg founded and co-chairs; it doesn't appear that the second letter made anyone sick. You know, like, in a medical way.
And then there's the new letter to Obama, which like the two letters sent to Bloomberg, was also postmarked in Shreveport, Louisiana. NBC New York reports that this letter has text that is identical to a threat contained in the letter to Mayors Against Illegal Guns, saying "what's in this letter is nothing compared to what I've got planned for you."
So far, nobody has been seriously injured, so let's all be thankful for the incompetence of whoever this second-amendment terrorist is. (Hey, why isn't Obama calling this terrorism? Where's The Outrage? Insert your own false flag joke here...or if you are Alex Jones, we have a more specific suggestion for where you can insert a false flag.)
Before we go sit in the shower and sob like Dr. Tobias Fünke , let's also mention the very funny joke about killing a U.S. Senator that was made during an Eagle Forum conference call on immigration reform Wednesday night. When a nice person from Maine asked what could be done about Sen. Susan Collins, who favors a path to citizenship for undocumented immigrants, some wag suggested a second amendment solution, which the moderator cleverly tried to downplay:
BOB FROM MAINE: I’m from Maine and our Tea Party will be meeting up next week. What is the best way that we can get our senator to listen to us?
ANOTHER CALLER: Shoot her. [laughter]
MODERATOR: Yes, we will shoot her with…(inaudible) and phone calls.
Ha-ha! He was laughing too hard to say "with votes!" Yeah, we're pretty fucking tired of that trope, too. Could we please make it an Ex-Parrot, please?
While America's wingnuts are fantasizing about how awesome it would be to blow away a Senator who would like to let more people become Americans, and while somebody in Louisiana is sending poison to politicians who think it should be marginally less easy to buy guns, Slate's running tally of gun deaths since Newtown is up to 4,499 today. Just thought we should mention that.
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.