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Angry Lego cop is angry.


Here's another one for the annals of cops maybe-just-maybe behaving poorly in the line of duty, not that they ever do that. Charnesia Corley was on the way to get medicine for her mom, when she got pulled over for running a stop sign by police in Harris County, Texas. One of the cops claimed to smell weed in the car, so he went ahead and cuffed her and put her in the back of the squad car so they could do a vehicle search. And did they find any weed? Nope! So here's a ticket for running that stop sign, now you get back home to your sick mama, right? NOPE AGAIN! Because then the cop said he smelled weed inside HIS car, where Corley had been sitting, which means there's probably a bunch of weed in Corley's vagina, so BEND OVER LADY, let's do this RIGHT HERE:

She tells us he called for a female deputy, who then ordered her out again into the parking lot.

"She tells me to pull my pants down. I said, 'Ma'am, I don't have any underwear on.' She says, 'Well, that doesn't matter. Pull your pants down,'" Corley said.

She admits hesitating. Deputies say she resisted.

"I bend over and she proceeds to try to force her hand inside of me. I tell her, 'Ma'am, No. You cannot do this,'" Corley told us candidly.

And Corley has retained an attorney because, in her words, "I feel like they sexually assaulted me! I really do. I feel disgusted, downgraded, humiliated." Indeed, Corley told ABC-13 News in Houston that the lady cop told her that if she didn't open her legs, "I'm gonna break them." Remind us again what criminal activity is suspected here? That's right, weed, that thing you smell at Phish concerts and all other music festivals and also walking down your street, because at least one of your neighbors is smoking a bowl on the back porch probably.

Now Yr Wonkette is not an expert on the best practices when it comes to Roadside Texan Vagina Checkpoints, but we HAVE heard of this little thing called the Fourth Amendment, which protects against unlawful searches and seizures. But also, too, according to the website of this Texas lawyer we found, it is perfectly legal for a cop to search your car if he or she "sees evidence of drugs in the car," but it's unclear whether "I think I smell something" lives up to that standard. Cops are also allowed to search your body parts, if you are in "lawful custody."

Corley's lawyer, Sam Cammack, says that "it's undeniable that the search is unconstitutional," and that the public nature of the search was a violation of her civil rights.

And really, regardless of the legality of the search -- as long as she was in "lawful custody," it was probably legal! -- there is Dickishness Quotient at play here, which is really not regulated under the Constitution, but is more akin to something these Texas cops' mamas SHOULDA taught them, if they even have mothers. If you do not suspect that a lady is a danger to society, is it necessary to get a lady cop to ram her hand up the lady's vagina for everybody and Jesus to see, just to make sure there's no voodoo herb drugs up there, or can that wait until you get to the police station? The law clearly says that you can wait to go to the police station.

But of course, one wonders, having committed such a vagrant crime as running a stop sign, was the officers' time worth it? What treasure chest of contraband material did they discover, to reassure them they did some really good cop work that day?

She is charged with two misdemeanors: resisting arrest and possession of marijuana. Investigators say they found .02 ounces of marijuana on her.

Oh sweet Jesus, thank you for protecting and serving the people of Harris County, Texas. Maybe everybody there will FINALLY get a decent night of sleep.

[ABC 13 Houston via BoingBoing]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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