Nikki Haley Pledges Allegiance To MAGA And The Desperation For Which She Stands

Nikki Haley's running for president, we swear! This noble endeavor demands that she tell Republican primary voters precisely what they want to hear. For instance, there's no such thing as a "glass ceiling" that limits advancement for women. Sure, there's all sorts of peer-reviewed data confirming the existence of said "glass ceiling," but if Haley wants to become the first woman president, she needs to proudly declare that women don't know nothing. That's the preferred Republican explanation for the obvious workplace gender gap.

This country functions as intended and is awesome! Republican voters don't want to hear otherwise. It's so divisive and distracting from the party's unifying drag queen bans.

“I think a lot of times for the past few years, we’ve been told how bad we are,” said Erick Myles, a retiree from Cedar Rapids, Iowa, who is white and was attending Haley’s town hall in nearby Marion. “That just isn’t the way to build a country.”

Donald Trump ran and won in 20216 on an "America sucks now" platform, and his 2024 campaign is even more nihilistic. But we all know why that was different.


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Haley is obviously aware that she's a minority woman, and she notices when a man suggests she's "past her prime." However, that's not the dreaded "identity politics," as she explained on Bari Weiss's podcast. "It's just loving who you are. I love being a woman. I love my heritage. I love how I was raised, and I love how it has made me who I am today.”

That ... kinda sounds like "identity politics." Republicans freaked out when Black people expressed love for their heritage during the Super Bowl. The only heritage Republicans believe matters is white Confederate AMERICAN heritage.

Haley seemed back on the MAGA message this weekend at a campaign event in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. She declared, "America’s not racist. America’s blessed, and all our children need to know how blessed we are. They all need to be saying the pledge of allegiance every morning.”

That wasn't a flub, either. It's apparently part of her stump speech. She reaffirmed her nationalistic zeal at a separate event.

Our kids needs to be saying the pledge of the allegiance when they start their day so that they know to love America.

Mandatory recitations of words is not how children learn to love anything. What a sad, desperate person Haley's become. What she's suggesting is a well-established violation of the First Amendment, which admittedly fits seamlessly with the rightwing attack on public education.

However, she'd reverted back to "identity politics" at her Myrtle Beach event when she smacked back at CNN anchor Don Lemon, who is not running for president. (He's since apologized for his sexist remarks about her.)

“I’m in my prime,” she said. “Every woman in this room knows what being in their prime is.” She made similar comments in Nevada, Iowa: “By the way, I am in my prime. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise."

Trump meanwhile is known for his unapologetically sexist remarks. He told conservative radio host Hugh Hewitt recently that Haley "just couldn't stay in her seat" and she "suffers from something that’s a very tough thing to suffer from. She’s overly ambitious."

After the midterms, Fox News assholes blamed single women for the downfall of their wonderful rightwing civilization, but Haley seems not to have noticed that, either. Maybe she watches CNN exclusively or she's a giant hypocrite.

[Washington Post / Myrtle Beach Online]

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. Once, he wrote a novel called “Mahogany Slade,” which you should read or at least buy. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."


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