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Why is Nikki Haley noping out of the UN ambassadorship by year's end? Dunno! But we've got 2,020 guesses!

This morning, the Axios shoe phone rang with the news that the well-oiled White House machine was losing one of the last "adults in the room." Moments after Jonathan Swan broke the scoop, Trump tweeted a summons for reporters to race upstairs for a presser on yet another successful resignation. They said it couldn't be done, no one ever had such tremendous staff turnover. But Trump proved the haters wrong! Winning!


Haley smiled for the cameras and insisted that she was definitely NOT considering a primary challenge to Trump. It's just time to go because, oh, so many reasons. Like she can think of two-thousand and twenty reasons right off the top of her head! And Americans have nothing to worry about, because she's leaving the nation's foreign affairs in the capable hands of Jared Kushner, "a hidden genius that no one understands."

Anyway, her departure has absolutely nothing to do with the ethics complaint filed YESTERDAY by Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington (CREW) over flights Haley and her husband took on private jets with "friends" who happened to be South Carolina businessmen who donated to her previous gubernatorial campaigns. So just put that -- and all the other members of the Trump swamp who got in trouble for their hinky first-class air travel -- right out of your filthy mind.

Here, have a palate-cleanser.

Now poor Ben will have to work that much harder to pretend that THIS IS ALL FINE!

It's not that Haley was a good ambassador, really. But we have to agree with Shapiro that her departure is not a positive thing. She's one of the few Trumplanders who do evil shit on purpose, rather than stumbling into it by accident while high on Fox and bootleg Viagra. If she was going to stab the Palestinians in the back, at least she let them know it was coming. She was terrible, but in an entirely predictable way, so you knew what to pack for your trip to hell.

God only knows what nightmare replacement Republicans will jam through in the lame duck session. Gorka? Yeezy? Javanka? So many bad, bad options, so little time. Because right after the midterms we'll be revving up for the 2020 presidential election. Which Nikki Haley will definitely not be participating in! She said so herself in this resignation letter. And we all know that politicians never lie, right? RIGHT?

[Axios]

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Five Dollar Feminist

Your FDF lives in Baltimore under an assumed identity as an upstanding member of the PTA. Shhh, don't tell anyone she makes swears on the internet!

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On Monday, someone attempted to murder George Soros by putting a bomb in his mailbox. Also on Monday, someone threw a rock into House Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy's office. Also, I spilled some hot coffee on myself. These are all things that happened on Monday, and were by some measure unpleasant. While most people might say, "Yes, all of those things are unpleasant, but they are not equal degrees of unpleasant," most people are not Chuck Schumer.

In what appears to be an attempt to get someone on Fox News to describe him as a "reasonable guy," Schumer sent out a tweet today lamenting the "despicable acts of violence and harassment" being done by "both sides."

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Republicans are KILLIN' IT in Florida, you guys! No worries about election day, Gators. It's all smooooooth sailing for the Sunshine State GOP. Just take it from Governor Rick Scott's lead pollster Wes Anderson, who produced a whimsical, unskewed poll for the campaign, featuring nostalgic jams about high Republican turnout in those good old days, telling the Tampa Bay Times,

As the linked slides indicate, Governor Scott currently leads Senator Nelson 51% to 46%, a lead that is outside of the margin of error.

It should also be noted that this sample from last week is very robust at 2,200 interviews of likely voters, stratified by county to reflect historic mid-term turnout. Our sample shows the Republicans with a one-point turnout advantage, even though we believe we will end up with a two- or three-point advantage. For historical context, in the past two mid-term elections Republicans had a four-point advantage in 2010 and a three-point advantage in 2014. At R+1, that makes our current sample a very conservative take on the likely partisan composition of this year's electorate.

NEEDZ MOAR BILL MURRAY.

No other pollster has replicated those numbers, with SurveyUSA, Quinnipiac, and CNN/SSRS all finding Bill Nelson in the lead, but if OnMessage, Inc. says Scott is running way ahead, then it must be true! Only OnMessage promises to "take your principles, your experience, and your opponent's weaknesses to develop a winning message plan that the voters will embrace." And who wouldn't trust a push pollster, right?

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