No, Donald Trump Did Not Tell That Dumbass He's Going To Kill All The Muslims

OK, internet, we're going to #slatepitch you for the second time in as many days, and you're going to like it, because Wonkette is right about all the things. The liberals on the computers are currently freaking out over a video from a Donald Trump town hall in New Hampshire where he, WE ARE TOLD, reassures a dumbass voter that he's looking into ways to get rid of all of the Muslims. And if you just read the transcript, it sounds like that! Let's look at the words and then Wonksplain what exactly is happening here:

TYPICAL DUMBASS TRUMP SUPPORTER: We have a problem in this country, it’s called Muslims. We know our current president is one.

TRUMP: Right.

TDTS: You know he’s not even an American.

TRUMP: We need this question. This is the first question ... (Trump laughs kinda like "You see this guy? YOOOGE bozo.")

TDTS: But anyway, we have training camps brewing where they want to kill us. That’s my question, when can we get rid of 'em?

TRUMP: A lot of people are saying that, and you know, a lot of people are saying bad things are happening out there.We're going to be looking at that and plenty of other things.

OK, now watch the video. Because you see, gentle readers, Trump is not "chillingly" telling a supporter that yes, we are going to go round up the Muslims and kill them dead. When he says "Right," he's not saying "You are correct, stupid man, I was just about to say that," so much as he's doing that salesperson thing where he "mm hmms" along to what a person is saying, so it seems like he's listening. And then he, very quickly we might add, gives the most general answer possible, agreeing that "PEOPLE ARE SAYING bad things are happening, and we're going to look at ALL OF THEM." Don't you worry, you racist New Hampshire fuckbiscuit! And then he rapidly moves on.

Is yr Wonkette saying Trump is blameless? FUCK NO! We're just saying the internet is interpreting this incorrectly.

Donald Trump has been saying TERRIFICALLY horrible things during this campaign. Mexicans are rapists and murderers, except for the ones who are lovely people; ladies bleed from their wherevers when they get mad; have you seen how fuckable my daughter Ivanka is? Et cetera. Hell, his anti-Mexican rhetoric inspired a couple of Boston thugs to beat the shit out of a homeless Hispanic man. Trump's followers are the stupidest, most racist people in America, and he's encouraging them, whether he's saying horrible things or sort of blowing off their questions without correcting them.

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And a lot of people are saying "AT LEAST JOHN MCCAIN!" Because remember that time, in the olden days of 2008, when the sad bumbling moron lady stood up at a town hall and blubbered to McCain about how Obama is an Ay-Rab, and McCain, FOR ONCE, corrected her and said no, Obama is a "decent person and a person you don’t have to be scared of as president of the United States"? And the shit-flinging crowd replied, "BOOOOOO HE'S A TERRIST!" Of course, at this point in McCain's campaign, it was October, and every person in his right mind knew Obama was about to become president. We ALSO knew John McCain had unleashed The Empress Of Nativist Bullshit herself, one Mrs. Sarah "Obama sure is pallin' around with a lot of terrorists" Palin, on an innocent nation MONTHS before.

McCain shares responsibility for elevating Sarah Palin, and for that batshit lady's question, and hell, it could be argued that he and Governor Quitterface share responsibility, WITH McCain's fellow P.O.W. hero Donald Trump, for Captain Derps-A-Lot's question at the New Hampshire town hall meeting.

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And remember ANOTHER thing Trump has been a part of? That's right, the birther thing, which is the Patty Duke Identical Cousin of "Obama's a Muslim." Remember that time Trump created jobs by launching a Hawai'ian investigation into Obama's REAL BIRTH CERTIFICATE? And remember how it was just as successful as all the Trump business adventures which have landed him in bankruptcy?

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The truth is that, just like people suddenly freaked out about Ann Coulter saying "fucking Jews," as if she hadn't ever been anti-Semitic in her WHOLE LIVER-SPOTTED LIFE before that moment, people are freaking out about this interchange like somehow OMG DRUDGE SIREN BUT THE LIBERAL VERSION!!!!11!! We're suddenly learning Trump isn't all that bothered by people who think Obama's a Mooslim, or a terrorist, or a gay Kenyan Marxist usurper. No shit, guys. He helped create it.

And look, Obama's not going to be in office after January of 2017 (OR WILL HE?), so maybe Trump, that paragon of self-awareness, isn't too worried about continuing to inflame all kinds of batshit nativist rhetoric against the president among the drooling hordes of paste-snorters who make up his constituency. Hell, 66 percent of Trump supporters think the president is a Muslim! And 61 percent believe he wasn't born in America. When you zoom out and look at all Republicans, more than half the party is just as dumb.

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What we really have here is a chicken-egg situation, except instead of asking which came first, it's more like Sarah Palin and John McCain are chickens and they laid a bunch of idiot racist eggs and then Donald Trump fucked some of those eggs and used the yolk as hair gel and, and now all the chickens and all the eggs are living directly on top of Trump's head, worshipping him as their king. Or something.

The point is fuck Donald Trump, but for better, more thorough reasons, and also fuck Sarah Palin and fuck John McCain and their racist, idiot supporters.

[The New Civil Rights Movement]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.


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