Noted Cultural Critic Allen West Reviews Macklemore's AMA Acceptance Speech, Gives It Two Thumbs Down

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Did you watch the American Music Awards, America? Did you sink into a pit of existential gloom about the whole thing? Will you be more or less gloomy if we now have to talk about Allen West, the one-term Congresscritter from Florida who now just terrorizes us via his web site and Fox News? It doesn't really matter how you feel, 'cause we're gonna talk about him anyway because of how we're mad with power. So Allen West watched the AMAs...Oh, who are we kidding. Allen West made some intern watch the AMAs with a specific eye towards finding something he could be poutraged about, hopefully of a hippity-hop-related variety, and Allen West did not have to beat that intern to death for failure, because the intern found A Thing to be mad at.


So Macklemore won best Rap/Hip-Hop Artist, which we told you was going to happen, even though that is all wrong and Macklemore is some earnest white straight boy bullshit and everyone played that "Same Love" at their wedding because ally, and we do not like Mr. Macklemore even one bit, nosiree. During his acceptance speech, Macklemore gave a generic sympathy shout-out to Trayvon Martin.

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