Noted Gun Fondler Will Stop Mass Shootings At Bars By Stiffly Regulating ... No, Not Guns, Silly!

Smart guy.

Larry Pratt of the Gun Owners Of America group is nothing if not sane and well-intentioned. He understands, like all good Gunfucker-Americans, that sometimes you need to do a little shooty shooty, for example to keep Congress in line, because that is a GOOD kind of shooty shooty. Another example of Good Shooty Shooty, he says, would have been if the teachers at Sandy Hook Elementary had spent a little less time protecting kids from getting shot, and a little more time doing Shooty Shooty. Like we said, sane and well-intentioned.

Pratt has now put on his thinkin'-and-shootin' cap, to rustle up the solution to the Pulse nightclub shootings in Orlando, which he explained to CNN's Carol Costello during a larger discussion about the gun control bills the Senate is considering Monday night. Costello wants to know, would it be OK for there to be a three-day waiting period for people on the terrorist watch list? Pratt says maaaaayyyyybe, but ...

Wannabe Rambo dipshits like Larry Pratt actually think if everybody in that club was armed, and somebody started shooting, everyone in attendance would be able to identify IMMEDIATELY, amidst the flashing lights and loud music, where the shooting was coming from, and then, having made that identification, would advance on the shooter en masse, singing praises to Jesus about how thank heavens this isn't a gun-free zone. Ahem, not so much. More likely, it would cause more mayhem and bloodshed, with good guys with guns accidentally shooting other good guys with guns, because they're four drinks and two jello shots in and they CAN'T GODDAMNED TELL WHO THE ACTUAL BAD GUY WITH THE GUN IS.

But maybe if it was just two drinks and no jello shots, and a bunch more guns? Eat a dick, Pratt, and eat a dick, CNN, for always asking the opinions of jizz wankers like him every time something like this happens.

[Crooks & Liars]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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