Now Rand Paul Wants Congress To Find Dirt On Hillary Clinton For Him

This is just getting sad. After promising A Big Reveal in the coming weeks about how the Clinton Foundation did Something Bad, only to beg the internet to try to find some Something Bad stuff and fax it to him please, now Rand Paul wants Congress to do his opposition research for him:


Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) on Monday called for a congressional investigation into whether donations to the Clinton Foundation influenced Hillary Clinton’s conduct while leading the State Department.

“I’ve talked to people in the Senate about whether or not there will be an investigation,” Paul said on Fox News’s “Fox and Friends.”

“I favor an investigation of this because we need to know that if you are going to elect someone to be president of the United States, if they’ve been accepting gifts that may influence them.”

Of course the senator wants an investigation into an already discredited book written by a conservative senior editor-at-large for Breitbart News -- same guy who once accused Disney of endorsing "the homosexual lifestyle," and who in January 2014 promised, on Fox News's "Hannity," that there were plenty of Obamacare "horror stories" a-comin'. Any day now, we're sure. So you can see why Very Serious Journalists are taking his "journalism" so seriously.

The book, which hasn't even been released yet -- except to the major media who cut a deal with this nutjob to investigate his wild speculations that SOMETHING SOMETHING CLINTONS SOMETHING CRIMESGHAZI!!! -- apparently contains plenty of errors, as the author himself admits, but whatever, details. Despite ABC News and the New York Times and the Washington Post combing through every "the" and "and" of the book, no one seems to have found evidence that proves Hillary, Bill, Chelsea, or the ghost of Socks did anything, you know, wrong. That hasn't stopped the author from claiming his book does demonstrate why Hillary is not fit for office and should probably go to JAIL. Here he is on Sunday's "This Week With George Stephanopoulos," exhibiting his smoking gun:

STEPHANOPOULOS: Do you have any evidence that a crime may have been committed?

SCHWEIZER: Well, I think it's -- if you look at a couple of recent examples. For example, Governor McConnell down in Virginia, or you look at Senator Menendez, in these cases, you didn't have evidence of a quid pro quo. What you had was funds flowing to elected officials, some of them gifts, some of them campaign contributions and actions that were being taken by those public officials that seemed to benefit the contributors.

Certainly, I think it warrants investigation. What that investigation will reveal, we'll see.

STEPHANOPOULOS: But a criminal investigation?

SCHWEIZER: Well, we'll see. I mean that's what the Governor McConnell has faced and that's what Menendez has faced.

If the conviction of Gov. Bob McDonnell and the indictment of Sen. Bob Menendez doesn't prove that the Clintons did something wrong, you will probably never be persuaded, but it's all in there, right in the book, all that "evidence" -- which can be summarized as "Come on, it's the Clintons!"

The one thing the book does prove is that Bill Clinton can charge a metric fuckton of money for giving speeches (he got half a million bucks for a single speech in Moscow), which has enabled the Clintons to make, well, a metric fuckton of money. That's the sort of thing that is more likely to annoy the left (EAT THE RICH!), but last we heard, making money, even a metric fuckton of it, was not considered a bad thing by Republicans, and certainly not cause for a congressional investigation. Being Hillary Clinton, though -- wife of Bill Clinton, probably the next president of these United States, and doer of, like, EVIL STUFF AND THINGS? Yeah, that's reason enough. At least according to Rand Paul and probably the rest of his fellow GOP primary candidates. And that is why Paul believes Congress should spend more time and taxpayer dollars looking into this book and the conspiracy theories in it, because lord knows he doesn't have the time to read it. He's got a presidential election to lose.

[The Hill / Media Matters / ABC News]

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