OANN Cooked Up A Poll For President Trump To Snort, Shoot, Smoke, Or Pop. It'll Make You Feel Good!
Fox's inbred cousin One American News Network has released a poll of Arizona voters, and it is a holy wonder. Donald Trump is going to get all tingly in his orange bits when he discovers that he's running four points ahead of Biden instead of four points behind. Martha McSally is not A IDIOT, though, so she's probably not going to fall for a poll that shows her four points ahead of Democrat Mark Kelly, rather than trailing him by 10. On the other hand, she is getting pretty desperate, so ...
Okay, let's take a look at this poll, shall we? See if maybe there's some way they manipulated the pool of "527 registered, likely voters in Arizona" sharing their opinions via "interactive voice responses and an online panel of cell phone users."
Uhhhhhh, 47 percent of respondents to this poll voted for Trump four years ago, and only 33 percent for Clinton? Does that seem like a representative sample of the electorate?
In fact, it does not!
They shaved off 11 percentage points worth of Hillary Clinton voters from the jump? Very subtle! Well if OANN deliberately undersampled registered Democrats, that would show up in the party registrations, right?
Hmm, let's just compare that to the party breakdown according to Arizona's Secretary of State.
Fam, we are shook! They look to have given Democrats a haircut here, too. Whodathunkit from a network that had to pull its own poll last month for being complete garbage! And just for good measure, let's compare the racial breakdown of their sample set to the Census Bureau's estimate that Hispanics make up 32 percent of Arizona's population.
UH HUH. So when they say, "The results are weighted by voting demographics," what they mean is "We arbitrarily decided that Democrats and Hispanics weren't going to turn up at the polls, which gave us the whiter, more Republican sample set we were hoping for."
So, now we know where they hid the salami — not that it was all that hard to find, TBH — let's see if stacking the deck yielded any spectacularly silly results.
In 2016, CNN's national exit polling showed Trump garnering eight percent of the African American vote, 28 percent of the Latino vote, and 27 percent of the Asian vote. OANN shows him at 22 percent with African Americans, 32 percent with Latinos, and a whopping 76 percent with Asians. And if you think that's some crazy shit, they're showing McSally beating Mark Kelly 53 to 47 among African Americans. Sounds legit!
How did those crank-yankers at OANN manage to find McSally beating Mark Kelly with less of the white vote than she got in 2018 when she lost to Kyrsten Sinema? It's magic!
Or perhaps it's done by piling leading questions on top of a GOP oversample. Those onanists asked a full four questions using the word "riot" (Whom do you trust to prevent violent riots in American cities?; Is rioting an effective way to change policy?; Is activating the national guard an effective way to prevent further rioting?; Who is more responsible for the riots across the country?), two about support for the police, and one about blaming China for the coronavirus.
Two weeks ago, before Arizona's COVID-19 numbers went through the roof, the pollsters from Sienna and the New York Times had Biden up 7 and Kelly up 9. But now that shit's hitting the fan courtesy of Republican Gov. Doug Ducey, OANN wants you to believe that the Grand Canyon State is coming home to the GOP.
Yeah, you bet.
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Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.