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Obama To Destroy America (Again) Within The Week, This Time With Messicans

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Hide the children and the sheep, because the end of the world is coming again. And it is President Obama's fault again. According to Hitler Fanboy Racist Piece of Filth Patrick J. Buchanan ("Pat" to his friends), we have exactly one week before the president burns the whole U.S. of A to the ground.


"Executive amnesty will set the country completely on fire. I do agree it might get out the Hispanic vote, but you will have red state Democrats denouncing the president for doing it, for engaging in unconstitutional action. It would be a tremendous firestorm which would really polarize the nation."

Buchanan's pearl-clutching warning that Obama is going to use his secret executive super powers ANY DAY NOW to grant amnesty for all the browns, instead of shipping them back to whatever not-America they came from so they can get killed to death, was issued during Friday's episode of "The McLaughlin Group" -- yeah, that's still a thing apparently -- so you know you should take it very seriously. After all, it airs on various public broadcasting stations (donate now for a tote bag!), and features Very Serious People discussing Very Serious Things, like whether Barack Obama is an Oreo.

We'd love to stick around to further discuss this droll and insightful commentary about Obama's secret plan to steal the election by amnesty-ing all the browns so they can vote Democrat, even though that will apparently piss off all the Democrats, so we are not sure how that works exactly, but whatever, it is "The McLaughling Group, damnit, and Buchanan says, "Barack Obama will do some kind of amnesty for the illegal aliens by Labor Day," so it must be true.

However, given that we are all doused in kerosene and Obama is going to light a match by Labor Day, we need to start packing and heading for the hills. Or at least head to the store to pick up some free-range grass-fed beef. After all, if Obama is burning the whole country to the ground, at least Labor Day is a great day for a barbecue.

[Breitbart]

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How do you do, fellow libs? We come together tonight to cheer and clap and cry and laugh, with our leader, Elizabeth Warren, and her fellow nice people Jay Inslee (the gold standard in climate action), Beto O'Rourke (excellent on being a good ally mostly), Cory Booker (best corny love hippie but also Wall Street, it's weird), Julian Castro (I don't know, people are super into him despite his creepy twinness and his too much pomade), Amy Klobuchar (bad bitch), Bill de Blasio ( ... ), John Delaney (???), and Tim Ryan and Tulsi Gabbard.

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We know, the thing we said in our headline is a thing you can say every day, but it's really intense today, maybe because Donald Trump is now filled with fear of the inescapable reality that millions of Americans who have not read the Mueller Report are going to see Robert Mueller testify on live TV on July 17, and Donald Trump will be exposed. Maybe the Big Mac vending machine next to his golden toilet is on the fritz and he hasn't had gotten to eat a Big Mac on the poop chair since last night. Maybe he's just a weak and sad person, a collection of shithole cells God meant to throw in the garbage, but accidentally implanted in Mary Trump's turkey incubator. We imagine that'd lead to a pretty constant state of anxiety and ennui.

Whatever it is, he's totally fucked right now. We were going to write a nice post about Trump's batshit interview on Fox Business with Maria Bartiromo, but we were busy, and by the time we got to it, he had performed so many batshit feats that we're just going to stick them all in this one post.

Let's start with the fight he's trying to wage with US soccer star Megan Rapinoe, who in a now-viral video stated that she has no fuckin' interest in going to the White House to meet that idiot. He got into a quarrel with her on Twitter ... or at least with a Twitter account that didn't belong to her. It's now been replaced, in order that the adult president may shit-tweet at the soccer superstar who hurt his feelings, but Splinter grabbed the original:

The rant continued:

Right. And Megan Rapinoe just said win or lose, she has no interest in meeting your crusty ass, because no decent American would consider that an honor.

Besides, she has already been to the White House to meet a legitimately elected president:

By the by, the owner of the incorrect Megan Rapinoe account saw Trump's whining and told him to grow a dick and set it on fire:

Ya burnt!

But as we said, it was a whole day of batshit from Trump, so let's continue.

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