Oh No, Did Marjorie Taylor Greene Accidentally Convert To Nation Of Islam Yesterday?

Conspiracy theories
Oh No, Did Marjorie Taylor Greene Accidentally Convert To Nation Of Islam Yesterday?

Imagine you're Marjorie Taylor Greene, looking around this fanciful world of ours and trying to understand what you see. Haha, that was a good "putting ourselves in others' shoes" thought exercise, we are goddamn saints.

The GOP congresswoman from Georgia has created the most wondrous Twitter thread in US American history of Twitter threads about what happened when she visited the DC jail, and because she has zero self-awareness, she hasn't deleted it.

Let's take a look:

Marjorie Taylor Greene tweet: "1. One of the benefits as a Member of Congress is visiting different types government facilities to provide oversight. On my recent visit to the DC Jail one of the things I picked up was some religious material. They had options. Christain and Islam."

Greene explained that there were two kinds of religious material at the jail: "Christain and Islam." And she read them.

Greene said, "I feel it's important to know what people read and are subjected to while in jail. After all, they can not just leave and go find whatever they want to read." How right she is. She is really a real congressperson.

But oh no, what is this?

tweet: "The DC Jail offered Louis Farrakhan's Nation of Islam newspaper. The DC Jail also signs everywhere telling inmates to vote and also informing them that felons can vote."

The jail had the Nation of Islam newspaper! And there were signs telling people to vote, because it's one of the few places in America where felons never lose their right to vote.

This thread is getting interesting!

Greene did not like what she saw in the Nation of Islam newspaper, because it said "white hate" and "white fear" were fueling "white rage." (Sounds about right?)

But no, Greene said, that's not true. "We, Republicans, see and believe that all people have equal rights under the law and constitution and those rights extend to the unborn. But I do know a lot of people who don't trust the government."

It was at this point that Greene encountered some nuance she was not perhaps expecting, that the corners of her universe started to pull and stretch, and she maybe got that look on her face that she gets. You know, the one at the top of this post.

Because on the one hand, the Nation of Islam paper said "white rage," and as a verified white, MTG was 'raged at that.

But then she turned the page:

tweet: "But I also found out the the Nation of Islam sees the use and benefit of Ivermectin and is very angry that our media, Democrats, and Dr Fauci have attacked the drug and refuse to save people's lives by not promoting it and shutting the use of it. We have common ground there."

She turned the page and learned that the Nation of Islam loves horse paste.

That's what she found out when she turned the page.

Raise your hand if you're now concerned Marjorie Taylor Greene might accidentally convert to Nation of Islam by the end of this thread and not know how it happened.

Us too. Especially when she found out that "The Nation of Islam is also strongly against the #COVID19 vaccines."

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

And they're against the vaccines for kids! "More common ground," as Greene explained, completely unaware of how far she's derailed her own thread at this point, and how worried about her we all are.

tweet: "And the Nation of Islam is very against children being given the #COVID19 vaccines. More common ground. Children should NOT be taking covid vaccines, as all data shows they are hardly at risk."

Now, it is analysis time, because Marjorie Taylor Greene is an analyzer-type person. She explains that the Nation of Islam's stance here is "problematic for party of identity politics," because we all know how the Nation of Islam = Black people, and the Democrats are "identity politics" which = Black people. You see what she is saying?

Greene further adds that there are "extremely high amounts of deaths" being reported on VAERS, the website where stupid rightwing white people (and some hippies) who get warts on their weenuses go to tell everybody they just died of the COVID vaccine but they got better. All sentient people know VAERS is not a reliable indicator of literally anything, but Tucker Carlson and other rightwingers have been lying to impressionable people like MTG and convincing them otherwise.

tweet: "'Stop Leading Black People to #COVID19 vaccine slaughter!' This is problematic for party of identity politics. Extremely high amounts of deaths are reported on VAERS, but there are no investigations into those deaths. Just Biden EO's that fine companies for #NoJabNoJob"

Now, if you are like literally everyone, you're starting to wonder how much longer this dipshit is going to babble about what she read in the Nation of Islam paper in the DC jail. And the answer is TEN MORE TWEETS.

And we are not going to go through TEN MORE TWEETS of Greene explaining what Louis Farrakhan has to say about vaccine mandates.

Now look, Marjorie Taylor Greene is still a Christian. She swears. "I'm filled with overflowing praise to God," oh good Lord, congressman, get a room. "I'm strongly opposed to radical Islam," blah blah blah blah.

But she just really believes in religious freedom, and since her version of Jesus also says no vaccines, and Nation of Islam says no vaccines, then a political alliance is ... born?

And that's where we get off this bugfuck train.

Greene clarifies that when she met with the accused January 6 terrorists, they didn't have any Nation of Islam newspapers in their section of the jail, they have Bibles, and they don't want vaccines and they are being denied all their human rights because they are unvaccinated.

"Haircuts, shaving, communion, chapel and more because they aren't vaccinated. They are given Nair to chemically burn off hair," she explained, about how unvaccinated white terrorists in prison have to Nair themselves.

And she said she was going on Tucker last night, to talk about all her outrages.

And we are not checking the internet to see if that happened, or how it went.

Good Twitter thread, Congresswoman. Good Twitter thread!

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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