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Oh Yeah, Apparently Newt Gingrich Dropped Out of The Race Today?

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Just kidding, no he hasn't. The Internet merely ran one of its "Newt Gingrich will suspend his campaign any day now" stories that it has run once every other week since February. Even these were starting to dwindle due to a pressing lack of media interest, so a Newt spokesman had to go and swear oaths before the reporters that it really will be happening within a week or so, just as soon as America has had an appropriate amount of days to grieve and put in their request slips for time off to hear his triumphant near-victory speech. Then, yes, then.


From WaPo:

Newt Gingrich is expected to suspend his presidential campaign within the next week and endorse former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney, a spokesman said.

Gingrich spokesman R.C. Hammond said that Romney called the former House speaker this morning to say he would welcome his endorsement, should Gingrich choose to end his campaign.

The two campaigns are “working out the details” of the endorsement, Hammond said.

It should not really take a week to explain to Newt Gingrich the "details" of how endorsements of other politicians "work," but no one can be surprised. [WaPo]

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Ann Coulter is not impressed with Donald Trump's presumptuous plan to stop ripping babies away from their mothers and sending them to infant prison. For quite a while, Ann has been obsessively lamenting the very idea that American people even have children to "fill their lives with joy," but now (lol, "now") Ann has shifted her rage to immigrant people. Every time you watch her waving her alien-length arms around in a ritualistic frenzy over how shitty liberals are, just remember that we have already seen the emptiness of her soul laid bare. Remember that time she wanted to eat your baby because you got a tax credit?

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Screenshot- Right Wing watch via Fox News
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It's just another Wednesday in an America that snatched kids from their parents and locked them up in old Walmarts. Trump just signed an unneeded executive order ending his heinous child separation policy, but his "the bad guy mobster in a mobster movie" tactics might've had some permanent damage. What remains of the shriveled-up soul of the grand old poor-screwing Republican party has finally had enough.

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