Oregon War Memorial Explosion Has To Be Atheist Terrorism, Because Duh, Atheists
A Vietnam war memorial in a park in Coos Bay, Oregon, was the target of asmall explosion last Thursday; while police have not made any arrests or identified any suspects, the forensic scientists at Gateway Pundit have decided that the bombing was the work of an "Atheist Group." Guest blogger* Mara Zebest presents her evidence-free analysis:
An atheist group is believed to be behind an IED explosion at a war memorial cross in Coos Bay, Oregon. Coincidentally, the cross has been the recent target of lawsuits from the atheist group, “Freedom From Religion Foundation” (FFRF). If it is proven this group planted an IED, can we officially declare the FFRF group a terrorist organization? Luckily the explosion didn’t kill anyone and damage was minimal charring to the memorial.
And who is it that "believes" the explosion to be the work of an atheist terrists? Not the police; they're categorizing it as "criminal mischief" and, as far as we can tell, have not even released any details about the size and type of the device. But here's a big surprise: Fox Radio's Todd Starnes found a spokesman at the "Liberty Institute" who was willing to do a little speculating:
“We unfortunately are now to the point where explosive devices are being placed next to crosses,” said Hiram Sasser, director of litigation at the Liberty Institute.
And yes, the Freedom From Religion Foundation did send a letter to the city asking that the cross be removed. Again, from Starnes' column:
“We have no objection to the veterans’ memorials,” FFRF attorney Rebecca Markert wrote to the city. “Our objection is to the message of endorsement of Christianity over other religions and non-religions.”
The FFRF is a Wisconsin-based group of freethinkers, atheists and agnostics that has a history of targeting small towns and communities on issues regarding public displays of the Christian faith.
“These people will stop at nothing to intimidate communities to tear down their veterans memorials,” Sasser told Fox News. “Now the crazies are trying to blow one up.”
Pretty neat step -- FRFF sends a letter, so obviously they are cross-bombing terrorists. Sasser also worried that the explosion could have killed or injured children playing nearby; Starnes' column doesn't mention that the explosion occurred somewhere between 11 p.m. Thursday and 1 a.m. Friday. (Not that anyone should ever set off a bomb in a park, of course. But Starnes is happy to leave the impression that someone set off a bomb in the daytime in a park full of kids.)
The Vietnam memorial and cross have been in Mingus Park (Yr Doktor Zoom grew up 30 miles up the coast, and has vague memories of feeding ducks there as a kiddo) since 1972, but has only become a matter of contention this year, after the FRFF sent the city its letter; no actual lawsuits have been filed. A local TV station notes that the cross has been the focus of graffiti by both opponents (the photo above) and supporters.
So, yeah, atheist terrorists. Yr Wonkette hopes that the idiot who set off the explosion is found and prosecuted, and if they're an atheist, we'd also like to give them some additional yelling-at, because for fuckssake, the Constitution is already on the side of secularism. As for Mara Zebest's suggestion that the FFRF was involved, we'll happily quote from the "hate speech" of the letter they sent in February to the city manager:
It is unlawful for Coos Bay to display a patently religious symbol such as a Christian cross on public property. We ask you to remove the cross from the park immediately or direct the display be moved to a more appropriate private location
Pretty much screams wild-eyed radicalism, doesn't it? The FFRF today condemned the bombing; we are sure Starnes and Gateway Pundit will update their posts to prominently feature that fact.
[Gateway Pundit / KVAL.com / Friendly Atheist / FFRF]
* Stupidest Man on the Internet Jim Hoft has been ill; we wish him a speedy recovery so that he can #PAYUP the $3150 he owes us.
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.