Right-Wing Cultural Shut-Ins Didn't Like The Oscars Very Much, Breaking News

Last night's Academy Awards were nice. Jimmy Kimmel did a mostly good job hosting. Everything Everywhere All At Once had a huge night, as expected, but some other great movies also were recognized, like the stunning All Quiet On The Western Front. History was made.

And as always when there is a cultural event, America's right-wingers reaffirmed that they are no longer part of the cultural conversation, that it's left them behind for good. You can't even call them counter-culture, because that is itself a cultural phenomenon. They're just irrelevant.

Howver, compared to, say, the Grammys, they're being pretty quiet about the Oscars. Maybe at this point that event is just too far out of their orbit, or maybe they're too distracted strumming their Deliverance banjos while saying the Silicon Valley Bank failed because it was too "woke."

We had more fun with the jokes people at the Oscars made at the expense of right-wingers and other idiots.

For instance, Kimmel was talking about the "editing" category, and noted what miracles editing is responsible for: “Editors do amazing things. Editors can turn 44,000 hours of violent insurrection footage into a respectful sightseeing tour of the Capitol. Their work is under-appreciated.” It was a good joke because Tucker Carlson's splice job didn't fool one patriotic American, and everybody still knows January 6 was a domestic terrorist attack incited by Donald Trump to overthrow democracy.

People loved it when Best Actress winner Michelle Yeoh told women to never let anybody tell you you're "past your prime," which everybody was pretty sure was a dig at CNN's Don Lemon's recent comments about Nikki Haley being "past her prime." Yeoh was the first Asian person to ever win Best Actress, and only the second woman of color.

We're not saying there are no wingnut reactions to mock, just that we had to look harder for them.

Over at Gateway Pundit, Stupidest Man On The Internet Jim Hoft was very upset about Kimmel's terrible mean jokes about conservatives. "Apparently, they didn’t want a real comedian like Greg Gutfeld" to host, he said. (Wingnuts are very excited Gutfeld's late-night ratings are so high, and they seem to think Gutfeld is taking viewers from other late night hosts, as opposed to his ratings coming from Fox News watchers who fall asleep during Laura Ingraham and leave the TV on.)

Commenting on Kimmel's joke about Tucker's heavily edited footage of the J6 terrorists, Hoft wrote, "The leftist audience loved it. They love mocking their political prisoners." He added, "They do not care in the least that hundreds of American families are being persecuted for non-violent misdemeanors. It makes their day." That does sound like the leftists.

Breitbart has a little section about the Oscars. They didn't like the champagne-colored carpet. They didn't like how there were barriers around the event space when Hollywood WON'T EVEN SUPPORT BUILDING A WALL BETWEEN AMERICA AND MEXICO.

They didn't like Jamie Lee Curtis thanking her trans daughter during her Best Supporting Actress acceptance speech. They hated that so much they felt the need to put juvenile scare quotes around "daughter" in the headline.

Weirdo Benny Johnson attempted to perfunctorily check the box of doing Oscar commentary when he whined about a presenter who used the words "identify as women," but it was lazy.

Matt Walsh didn't likeEverything Everywhere All At Once, so if you haven't seen it yet, there's an endorsement from a guy who spends a whole lot of time obsessing over the genitals of kids he's never met. (You will be shocked to find out what he was tweeting about during the actual Oscars, just kidding no you won't.)

Maybe when all these maladjusted never-nudes get on the radio later this afternoon they'll give us some more of their good old-fashioned white man whining and complaining about the Oscars. But for now it's pretty dry out there.

We'll leave this post with this moment that Breitbart did manage to bitch about, one of the directors of Everything Everywhere All At Once saying he dressed in drag as a child and asserting that drag is a "threat to nobody," a glaringly obvious truth to anybody who doesn't eat glue.

In response, Breitbart, proving it's just as much of a cultural shut-in as any other conservative these days, said Tennessee had recently banned "often raunchy and sexually explicit [drag shows] in front of minors." Are drag shows for grown-ups often risqué? Sure. Is a drag queen reading a storybook to a group of children at a library "raunchy and sexually explicit"? Nope.

We've said it before and we'll say it again and again: If you think drag is inherently sexual, that's about you. Not about drag. You're telling on yourself, conservative dudes.

Anyway, good Oscars, everyone!

And if you didn't understand why Jimmy Kimmel brought a small donkey onstage at one point, please do watch The Banshees Of Inisherin, it's fabulous.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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