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Martini Glambassador's avatar

She’s owl that! It’s yer hed gif source, and it’s a hoot!

https://open.substack.com/pub/martiniambassador/p/if-you-call-owl-come-runnin

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Ward From Cali's avatar

Pussy in Bio, Hooters in Tabs. Sigh. The Internet used to be so wholesome.

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Vagenda and Peeara's avatar

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Emil Muz's avatar

I was going to suggest this, but since it was Martini I thought it deserved a pass.

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Boogie Mama's avatar

So you're saying.... the owls ARE what they seem?

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John Thorstensen's avatar

I just went to Haverford College for my 50th reunion, and got to hang out with some old friends from Bryn Mawr, home of truly badass women (in a good way, e.g., Judge Beryl Howell went there). Bryn Mawr's mascot is the owl.

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memzilla's avatar

♫ ♪ ♬ Owl be seeing you

In all the old familiar places... ♫ ♪ ♬

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Menotsure's avatar

People say owls are wise, but given the state of modern humanity how would we know?

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Shocktreatment's avatar

An owl resides at the end of the alley opposite me, I hear him often. I only see him clearly when he's at rest, in motion, he's a blur. Favors small mammals over birds. Other blocks have a plethora of rabbits and squirrels, not so on this one...

Owls are good neighbors except for the scat, obligate carnivore scat.

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Ellie Alive In 25's avatar

I love owls, and am impresses by the length of their legs.

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PrimerGray's avatar

I had a dog who was fascinated with owls. I would play me piano and 'e would 'owl and 'owl right along, 'appy as could be.

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Martini Glambassador's avatar

Oh you!

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PrimerGray's avatar

That's wot all the birds say to me.

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Stroke1's avatar

/crosses arms, looks stern/

That'll be owl.

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Broderie Anglaise's avatar

I love owls. My only problem with them is their shit grammar. It should be 'to-wit, to-whom'.

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Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Their grammar is just owlful.

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tehbaddr's avatar

I have never thought about Owls nostrils till now!

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Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Oh, man, dude. You've been missing out something fierce!

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Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Owlrighty then!

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The Wanderer's avatar

Owl's well that ends well.

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Queroloustwo's avatar

Owl drink to that!

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Daydrinking is my JOB!'s avatar

I seem to recall (vaguely) dropping a tab of Owlsley circa 1971. Probably listened to some Who.

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The Wanderer's avatar

Who!

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TootsStansbury 🇺🇦's avatar

Owl be back

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Queroloustwo's avatar

Goodbye from Owl of us.

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Snarfyguy's avatar

Who?

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Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Who B. Hoot, esq. Professional Owl.

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Stroke1's avatar

Hoot's on first?

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Emil Muz's avatar

I don't know

Third Base

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Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Yes. Because of course Hoot is.

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Janet Martin's avatar

Ugh, I fell into the rabbit hole of that guy’s twitter for about 20 minutes and now I feel all scuzzy.

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Atrele Kasha's avatar

No Joshua, YOU think it's all about sex, because YOU are completely incapable of imagining a close relationship without some sort of sexual aspect.

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Alternative Dog's avatar

𝘛𝘳𝘶𝘮𝘱’𝘴 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘺, 𝘋𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘥 𝘞𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘵𝘰𝘯, 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘗𝘳𝘰𝘗𝘶𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘢 𝘢 𝘤𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦-𝘢𝘯𝘥-𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘥𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘭𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘱𝘶𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘥. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 “𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘬𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘨𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘥𝘦𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘗𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘛𝘳𝘶𝘮𝘱 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘦𝘷𝘢𝘭𝘶𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘭𝘦𝘨𝘢𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘦𝘴.”

And ProPublica, being the honorable journalism outfit they are, basically said "fuck you" and published the article. Good.

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DJ Teetop's avatar

Steven Cheung is the Baghdad Bob of 2024

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defpac's avatar

I am not crying, you are.

https://x.com/EmmanuelMacron/status/1798032906784501943

Welcome to France, heroes.

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Queen Méabh's avatar

3-yr-olds have absolutely no understanding of sex. But they do understand empathy, and that's what the right can't tolerate.

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Melissa's avatar

Anytime a right-wing dung bomb starts accusing anyone of teaching 3-year-olds about sex, an emergency child abuse swat team should descend on them and confiscate their hard drive! scumbags

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BecomingJenn's avatar

you all in my brain again? Been hearing my thoughts? (esp after noticing a pattern and my ND brain is REALLY good at that pattern thing)

Great minds and all that sort of thing.

Yeah, so with you.

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John_atx's avatar

Damn it. Houston Chronicle reported today that. Houston area US House representative Sheila Jackson Lee has announced that she has pancreatic cancer. Jackson Lee is a longtime Democratic representative and recently was defeated by fellow Democrat John Whitmire in the race for Houston mayor

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Doug Langley's avatar

Had a friend with a 3 year old son. There were reports of child molestation, so Dad sat down with son and explained the facts of life. I didn't know that. So next time I come over Junior asks me "Do you have a penis?" I thought I hadn't heard right and was "uh, what was that?" Then he starts fussing with my fly. Dad was dying of embarrassment.

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Ward From Cali's avatar

Evan really does come up with the very finest insults, it's his True Calling:

"Speaking of Greene, Brian Glenn, the human sunburn who humps her leg romantically..."

"Human sunburn" is excellent, but romantic leg humping is the chef's kiss, isn't It?

Also, anybody can (and do!) slam the New York Times, but leave it to Evan to put that special Southern topspin on it. 'Cause when asked about the Times's stalwart journamalism, we can all agree that they have really good recipes. The best!

Dunno about you, but Evan just sent me a PERSONAL NOTE through Substack (it was too personal, shut up) inviting me to read his new blogthingie. Of course, what is there to unpack about a twoot saying that Sesame Street is sexxing up the three-year-olds by teaching Elmo that non-hetero mommies and daddies are still mommies and daddies? But Evan would not tease something so obvious as insightful unless he had more to say than that. It'll probably be a little while because I have a backlog, but I WILL check it out.

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Sarah Smile's avatar

I made the NYT Cooking's egg-in-a-nest breakfast sandwich last week and it was really good, so I will grudgingly admit they sometimes get it right (unlike every other section in that rag). But they're still on double secret probation after that whole "peas in guacamole" thing and likely will be forever.

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VogonPoeticLicense's avatar

An interesting interaction with the lovely songbird L, last evening. She shot some video clips of my singing, and asked me if I wanted them. I don't know if I was grinning face-splitingly or staring with my mouth open, but I managed to convey affirmativishness. When she then asked for my phone number to send them, my frequent approach to chat up women, I'm pretty sure delight won out over shock and surprise in the bid to arrange facial muscles into something recognizable as human expression. Then she took a selfie of us, and said, "So you know who they're from."

She got up to sing next, so I asked her if she was doing anything with a horn section. Yadda Mondatta, she decided on Unchained Melody, and kept signalling she wanted more of the 'zoobone as the song went on.

The ring on her finger notwithstanding, I want to spend some more time in her company.

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Manic Pixel Dream Girl's avatar

“Florida’s fascist lege tried to ban the flying of Pride flags on government buildings. Here are a bunch of cities in Florida defiantly flying them.” -They will allow them if they’re flown upside down though I guess … 🙄

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Blanche de Shambles's avatar

Sarah McLachlan is a national treasure (in Canada), but you also know that as soon as you hear the chorus to "Angel" she's about to ruin your entire fucking day.

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Satanic Pancake's avatar

"PRIDE month is all about sex . . ." Ummm, I'm going to need a citation or two, Mr. Internet Everything Expert.

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Manic Pixel Dream Girl's avatar

Says so much more about him, etc … Sounds like someone needs that creepy app MAGA Mike forced on his son.

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DeVoid's avatar

See, generally, 2000 Mules

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