13 Luxury Vacations That Won't Break The Bank! Tabs, Wed., Aug. 16, 2023

They kind of will though. Morning news roundup!

Tabs gif by your friend Martini Ambassador!

Bill Gates and I have an average of $58 billion. Donald Trump and all other US presidents have an average of 1.9 felony indictments. (Insider)

OMG so much RICO. (Indictment)

Hmmm looks like New Hampshire’s liking the cut of Chris Christie’s jibber jabber! (Mediaite)

Sen. Tina Smith, the “velvet hammer.” Oh lord, so many dick jokes, STOP IT YOU! — Huffpost

A note from your comrade Crip Dyke comparing the Montana Children’s Climate Change case to the precursor to Brown v. Board of Education. Thanks Crip Dyke!

Let’s celebrate the Montana children’s fine-ass win this Saturday, 5-8 p.m., in the Missoula, Montana, Union Club Bar & Grill, 208 E. Main. Drinks, as always, are on me!

TRIGGER WARNING, SKIP THIS ONE IF YOU HAVE TO. The sixth grader didn’t know sex was how you made a baby, so after she was raped in her front yard, she didn’t tell her mom, and then it was too late for an abortion because all the bans had gone into place, and here she is, starting seventh grade. So that’s a story you could read about. (Time)

Let’s have a drink.

Should we underestimate Gen Z? Digby says no, with receipts! I LOVE YOU GEN Z.

Fairfax Public School District tells Virginia Gov. Glenn Youngkin it will not be punching the trans children in the face, sorry :( (Erin in the Morning)

I agree, these women should not vote. (Also, they’re all fucking exhausting.) — Media Matters

Wait a minute, this time the insurers are charging the doctors the bullshit fees? Joe Biden, Pro Publica found some junk fees for you to crack down on!

LOL, fighting junk fees is “woke.” (It is actually.) — Cory Doctorow at Pluralistic

Hey remember when I got the fuck out of Montana and moved to Detroit, for (among other things!) culture? Which of these beasts am I gonna date night on? I guess that’s for Shy to know and me to find out! (SHY! MAKE US A DATE NIGHT!) (Whitney CityFest)

Luxury vacations! Eh … eh. — Travel & Leisure

Don’t forget to email me at rebecca at wonkette dot com if you want the address of our Labor Day Monday Detroit party! Or if you’re closer to the Berkshires, check out Paul and Holly’s Wonker campout at wonkmeet!