560 Comments

Source credit for today’s hed gif goes to Taiyo 'T' Masuda on YouTube for this beautiful sunset wave shot from Manly Beach. Why is it manly? We’ll click here to find out:

https://open.substack.com/pub/martiniambassador/p/its-a-manly-manly-beach?utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web

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“A manly man came up to me, manly kind of a guy, and said: ‘I want to thank you, Mr. President, for saving our country.’ And he had tears coming down his manly face,”

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ROFL!

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Thoughts on manliness from one who is missed.

Beer commercials usually show big men, manly men, doing manly things: "You've just killed a small animal. It's time for a light beer." Why not have a realistic beer commercial, with a realistic thing about beer, where someone goes, "It's 5:00 in the morning. You've just pissed on a dumpster. It's Miller time."

Robin Williams

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This talk about beer or Miller's, whatever, has me reminiscing about my first favorite beer: Rolling Rock Cream Ale. Today's favorite is a local brew from Sugar Creek Brewery - their White ale and then their Blood Orange IPA.

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I have manly.. . it's manly. So manly.

So manly, you the manliness would melt your brain.

it's manly whiskers.

In my sink.

You can't handle my sink-whiskers.

Because you're a fucking P-word.

My whiskers.

For only thirteen payments of $19.99.

Operators are standing by.

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No one can handle the condition of the sink after I've shaved my chest.

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For the hairiest sink in the whole wide world,

Go to My Whiskers.com!

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Timed out.

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Loading with no idea what to expect from link.

Still loading....

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It's three AM and you just pissed the bed. It was Miller time.

You just had a fight with your wife, it's Miller time.

You're on lunch break from your teaching job. It's Miller time.

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Alcohol is simple (Miller Time)...

Everything is an excuse to drink.

"I had a bad day. I need a drink."

"I had a great day. Let's celebrate! With a drink!"

There is no situation on the planet that doesn't end in a legitimate reason to drink.

Although I will say that video games do this a lot less than reality...

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I just ran out of good beer. It's Miller time.

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One Paulaner and Miller is ruined forever.

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Have patted the bronze pig outside the Paulaner many times..

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Tis a lovely place.

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Thanks for the suggestion! Will be picking up a sixer of Salvator later today.

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Excellent suggestion. Haven't had a Polly in years.

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Same color as the Sauerkraut in München.

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Because the manly men wrestle bull sharks.

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There are residential developments on the gold coast of Australia where they have salt water canals dug throughout so every house is "waterfront property." While I was living near one of these back in 1990, a 78-year-old manly Aussie man jumped into one of said canals and wrestled out a 6-foot shark, which he landed and then went to fetch a large knife to dispatch it.

Quoted in the local paper, he said "The fish was the same size as me, so it was a fair fight."

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Those canals, tho. They have them down at Mandurah as well and it's just asking for bull shark shaped trouble. They love the murky water.

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He later died from a spider bite.

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Manly Beach...where all the dicks hang out.

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There was an officer in the UK Royal Navy whose name was Manley Power.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manley_Laurence_Power

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It's the name that you want to touch, but you must not touch!

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One of my drill sergeants was named Richard Faas. And yes, his last name was pronounced face. We dared not call him Dick. Mainly because we just called him "YES, DRILL SERGEANT!!!1!!!"

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Manley Power came up from submarines ... obviously.

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I knew someone named Guy Manly.

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Not exactly related to your post, but I recently found out that in 1933, one of Oxford's most eminent practising physicians rejoiced in the glorious name of Sir Farquhar Buzzard. This made me very happy indeed.

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No love for Mortimer P. Eggblat III?

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I'm afraid I am not aware of the fellow. However, I have great deal of affection for Mrs Stuyvesant Fish.

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I remember that Mrs. Stuyvesant Fish, a Gilded Age owner of an elaborate "cottage" in Newport, once complained "we are not rich... we only have a few million."

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Hell, we had generations of Ham Fish's representing our hometown in Congress

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Manley Power and the Dick Armey is my new...look, I'll think of some genre for that band!

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Genre should be straight up '70s style hard rock. Rock out with yer cock out!

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(gigglesnort)

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Quote/

Sen. Tina Smith, the “velvet hammer.” Oh lord, so many dick jokes, STOP IT YOU!

/Quote

ObDr.HorribleQuote:

"These...[waves fists] are not the hammer. [walks away, comes back] The hammer is my penis."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_O0jNYOGTQ

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As New College of Florida prepares for its first academic school year under the new, conservative board appointed by Ron DeSantis, 40 members of the faculty have resigned, the course schedule book is "in flux", and a parent who called when their child, a student there, could only find two courses in the schedule book related to their major, the school told them to just pick other courses.

Meanwhile, a liberal arts college in New Hampshire is offering admission and transfer of all credits for any New College students in good standing. A lot of people are taking them up on their offer.

Thanks, Ron.

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I really hope Gerardo is getting an extra bump in royalties from the past few days.

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As I'm currently applying to jobs in the DC area, any time Youngkin gets kicked in the dick puts a little skip in my step.

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Well, fuck.

Here I get a shout out in the TABS and it's to something I did not put even one dick joke in. This is the shit that's going to kill my reputation, y'know, Trix.

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Meadows getting on the crazy train early by filing to remove to District Court. Hey Mark, Chief of Staff is not an "officer of the United States". It's not a real job, just a title for glorified cofeve boy.

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Dear god, that poor baby. wtf is wrong with people? Both of them at this point. Kid's only 2 years older than my lad and the cops brought him home last month when he'd wandered to the park next block over. (Without permission, but still.) Because someone at the park decided he wasn't old enough to be there alone.

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The Tucker Carlson biography is selling so badly I thought the number was a typo: https://www.theguardian.com/books/2023/aug/15/tucker-carlson-biography-chadwick-moore

Probably that hideous cover is throwing people off, yeesh.

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That's what happens when you don't have the Republican Party buying up all your books to give out as swag to the rubes.

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The publisher could donate the unsold copies to the homeless so they can burn them for heat this winter.

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Lack of exposure. On Fox it would have been talked about by every on air "talent" and the network would have bought a bunch of copies to give away. Also the older audience of Fox are much more likely to buy books (I didn't say they read the books) but Tukkker's not on the air any more so he's been forgotten.

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Drinks, as always, are on me!

So that's where my money's going, huh? When are you coming to southern NM? Oh, well, I still have Hooper to help console me.

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It's not usually What Are The QAnon Cretins Up To Today? every day but with so much going on, it's time for another episode of...What Are The QAnon Cretins Up To Today? !!!

In their usual glorious fashion, the QAnon Cretins have decided that:

1. I'd get my cowboy hat, and go down to Marble Arch Station (sorry, couldn't resist, great song!);

2. Seriously now, they've decided that the judge overseeing the GA case once worked for Soros-funded Phoney Fani Willis;

3. And that the judge has a typical pedophile's face (yikes!);

4. Also there is a loser named Brian Cates who claimed all the GA voter fraud cases brought in 2020/2021 were dismissed not on lack of actual evidence but only on lack of standing grounds, so therefore;

5. PAB's indictment is the greatest thing to happen in the history of the world because now he can prove all the VOTER FRAUD and ELECTION INTERFERENCE in court and also at his Monday presser;

6. Which is important because people who've spent time in the Fulton County jail are pretty sure PAB will be killed if he's ever sent to the Fulton County jail (and not with votes, either); and finally

7. Please please PLEASE tell me that Kash Patel is one of the unindicted co-conspirators. And in all the cases, that would be nice!

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I find hard to credit that the sixth grader didn't know how babies were made. The piece states that her mother didn't think she was old enough to be told. If the child was old enough to get pregnant, wouldn't she have started menses? Maybe she was hiding that from her mother, too - but that would have been the opportunity to breach the subject,

( I cringe at the prospect of a Wonker reading me the riot act for posting this )

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Sounded like crap to me as well but I'm really cynical

I agree with Sister Artemis below, but I still think this is much too pat of an answer for the situation. I still think that's what she told everyone after it all came up. Survivor shame kept her quiet for too long and then it was too late.

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I won't read you the riot act, but some mitigating info:

- It is possible to get pregnant the first time a viable egg shoots down the fallopian tubes and therefore before their first period, just like sometimes women who do know about pregnancy and menstruation get pregnant the very first time they have sex.

- My mom didn't tell me about menstruation till 5th or 6th grade - it was the 60s, and these days she'd most likely have told me much earlier. But in some families, they think younger girls are too young.

- And, in some families, no one really bothers to tell the girl until she comes sobbing to her mom/sister/aunty that she's surely DYING because look at all this BLOOD! And even then, the explanation tends to be pretty minimal

So, no riot act, but every kid lands into a different kind of family, and some of them are pretty twisted up around the subject of periods and pregnancy.

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" It is possible to get pregnant the first time a viable egg shoots down the fallopian tubes..."

Yeah, I guess I knew that. Sloppy thinking on my part.

And, your words about a girl's first menses us exactly what I was thinking there - but I can't see how a "minimal" explanation would not include the idea that the girl could now get pregnant ( not necessarily the body mechanics involved ). Is it possible this is what you think could've happened?

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In a lot of places in this country conservatives don't talk about it because they think if you talk about it then the kids will do it. That's why they don't have sex ed in schools. "Sex ed just teaches them how to do it and then they will be doing it in the streets!!"

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Yeah - I think those "conservatives" are the "uneducated" that PAB so loves. In many cases, these fools are in power.

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Educated conservatives feel the same way, though. Because that is how their parents felt about it. Religion plays a big part in it because of course it does. That is why there are so many people in this country, both men and women, who have no idea how any of this works. People who think you can't get pregnant the first time or you can't get pregnant if you do it standing up or all kinds of nonsense. Too much ignorance that could be addressed with a sex ed class. My class was taught in a catholic school but it was the 1970s and things weren't as crazy then.

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Oh, there's no doubt that religion is a pretty big factor in our country's reproductive ignorance.

As it is, I consider the term "educated conservatives" as kind of an oxymoron.

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All I can think of is the many women I've known who's explanation was basically "this is happening, here's how you use a menstrual pad, now watch out for boys" with no real info in the mix, let alone an explanation of how babbies are made. Embarrassment about sexuality is a hell of a thing, and in some families, those who should provide explanations that actually help cannot bring themselves to say the words that young women need to hear.

And how many kid's explanations were some version of "you've seen dogs going at it, right?"

It shouldn't be that hard, but for some people, it is.

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Yeah, I guess so. As it is, as a boy, I never got that equivalent talk - my father, when asked, said that I probably knew more about than he did ( and, actually, I did - and not just from the street )

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My landlord's (mandatory to use!) rent payment processing service is now charging ME, who is NOT their customer, a processing fee to do the handshake between my bank and theirs when I pay my rent. Howabout them junk fees? Talk about rent-seeking!

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Don't pay one penny more than the rent you are contractually obligated for.

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These career women travel the globe, without their husbands or children, telling young women to deny themselves the rights and opportunities these women have. What are they getting out of this? How does it benefit them to tell young girls to fully submit to their husbands or that men should be allowed to rape them? What do they gain when young girls are beaten and terrorized and told by everyone it’s the young girl’s fault? How does this benefit these gender traitors?

Wonkers - most children with uteruses in the US start puberty between 9 to 10 years of age. Please do not wait until middle school to talk about sex. Consent can be taught as early as they start using their bodies to interact with other bodies. If your baby gives hugs, they are ready to be taught they don’t have to give hugs. Most of all, tell them over and over again that if someone violates their consent, it is never your child’s fault.

Tell your children with uteruses how important it is that they come to you immediately if they think they could be pregnant, especially if you live in a red state and they want to terminate that pregnancy. Teach your boys everything I just highlighted, too. And for Crom’s safe, teach your boys the female reproductive system along with their own!

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