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Jan 22·edited Jan 22Pinned

A 1939 Rice Krispies commercial / theatrical short in your hed gif. More info and some WW2 history heeeeere: https://open.substack.com/pub/martiniambassador/p/come-see-the-violence-inherent-in?r=angu9&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcome=true

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Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

I didn't know Rice Krispies went back that far.

(Nowadays, any ad agency wanting to do a commercial like that would probably get screaming "costs too much!!!")

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Too long. We need to cut down to 39 seconds.

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Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

You are AWESOME.

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Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

Soooo- The dark haired kid seems to be wearing a BANYAN. Fraaaank?

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I wonder how much difference it would've made if Ub Iwerks had had a more conventional name.

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Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

It's all fists and attytude until they get smothered by marshmallow cream.

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founding
Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

Would not have guessed that was the remnants of the Iwerks studio responsible for.

Love learning the lore of snap crackle and pops is deeper than I could have imagined (willing to resort to crepe related violence to protect a healthy breakfast

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Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

As the Rice Crispy Trio rolled the bad breakfast elves into crepes, I had a bit of a vision of the young breakfaster enjoying some extra protein with his meal...

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The little character in the oilskin rainwear was a star of his own in cartoons. Kind of an early version of Dopey Dwarf,

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This reminds me a little of the commercial for I can’t remember where the little Sun jumps off the juice bottle and starts running around talking and the family all scream and run out of the room.

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author

I remember that one. It was for Sprite.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjK1aUU2Dx4

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founding
Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

OMG. One of Benicio Del Toro's early works, I guess.

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Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

I am now ded.

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"Deder than 7Up!"

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That’s it! Thanks! I am now cracking up!

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That would be a commercial for Sprite. For a while they parodied common commercial styles.

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Haha, this sounds amazing. I was always creeped out by the cannibalistic cereal that gleefully ate all of its compatriots…I think it was Cinnamon Toast Crunch? Advertising is weird.

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It was indeed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v92hwUb2OCM

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That was too funny; thank you so much!

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Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

Snap, Crackle and Pop kicking ass. Yeah.

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Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

I take this opportunity to share with this erudite colloquium that the German for 'Snap, Crackle and Pop ' is 𝕶𝖓𝖎𝖘𝖕𝖊𝖗, 𝕶𝖓𝖆𝖘𝖕𝖊𝖗, 𝕶𝖓𝖚𝖘𝖕𝖊𝖗 .

There is no charge for this service.

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Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

And in Norwegian it’s “Piff! Paff! Puff!”

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I am going to 𝘒𝘯𝘶𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘳 on over to the tavern and share some international!

Talk about erudite colloquia...

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author

Hi, Martini.

No snappy observation on your GIF this morning, just felt like I hadn't said hello in a while.

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author

Oh you! 😉

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Jan 22·edited Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

Wait ... did I just watch three human beings being killed in an intentional syrup flood? There's a point at which self-defense/stand your ground/justifiable homicide crosses the line back into regular old homicide, isn't there?

Dammit, now I have to pester Jack McCoy again.

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It was a "Stand Your Coffee Grounds" breakfast decision...

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It's alright, it was that crummy corn syrup based stuff.

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Just hoping that it's not a serial syruper...

Fuckin' autocorrect had a ball with 𝘴𝘺𝘳𝘶𝘱𝘦𝘳, "𝘴𝘬𝘺 𝘳𝘰𝘤𝘬 𝘦𝘳𝘢" was my favorite

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founding

Animated syrup homicide ripped from the headlines!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Molasses_Flood

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When I first heard of this event in the 80s, I had thought my brother had made it up!

Made me realize how totally uncertain life can be.

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History lesson. In the form of a freaky and rigged game show. Hosted by a bizarre handpuppet.

https://youtu.be/HAZlPuL3Qhw?si=ADmLegxsiZRHR0OB

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Puppet History is the greatest thing on YouTube.

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Beat me to it!

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Snowmobile accidents resulting in death are on the rise again this year. Trees and cars are getting in the way again. Oh, alcohol may be involved also.

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When it gets warm, the same idiots get into speedboats.

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And ATVs.

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The two most common snowmobile accidents in upstate NY are "ran into a tree" or "fell through a lake." It's always safe to assume that alcohol consumption by the operator is the cause.

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𝘈𝘭𝘤𝘰𝘩𝘰𝘭? Drinking and 𝘴𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘮𝘰𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨? In these United States?

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So is the causation the presence of snow or alcohol?

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It's the loose nut behind the wheel.

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Defective operator.

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There exists a strong correlation but definitive causation has not been established.

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Atv accidents happen enough as well as distracted drivers rear ending Amish buggies.

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We don't have as many ATV fatalities around here as we once did -- 52 statewide in one year, and I am not even kidding a little bit.

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‘Hey, don’t kill yourself with that thing. I can’t afford to buy another one.’

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‘They are only electrons being manipulated in a 2D matrix. Now you are being returned to your simulation. Please be calm.’

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Maybe they were NPC's?

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Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

I love this, Martini! Especially the soggy guy from the bad cereal.

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author

Their names are Mushy, Soggy & Toughy 😂

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Jan 22Liked by Crip Dyke, Martini Glambassador

I wonder if Mushy and Soggy have a bit of a rivalry at the office, trying to show that they're not a redundancy of the other?

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Breakfast elf water cooler politics!

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You're putting me on.

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Nice job. That was fun.

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Jan 22Liked by Martini Glambassador

DMT in them Crispies, seeing Cereal Elves!

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5-MeO's

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Sports Illustrated didn't just go off a cliff. It was pushed.

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Wow, we’re skipping the 1950s and winding the ol’ time machine back to the 1700s or so with the cadaver stealing and whatnot. I have a sick need to know what they wanted the leather FOR, exactly. Lampshade, book or tattoo artwork?

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Au Pied de Couchon...ah, brings back memories. The very first time I was in Paris, I was a poor college student who ran away from home because of the extreme unrest here (sound familiar?). I had spent close the 3 months bumming around Europe and had just about run out of money.

Spent my nights drinking with God knows who and most of the time, fetched up at Les Halles at Au Pied de Couchon, having onion soup at 3 am with all sorts of disreputable people, me chief among them.

God, that was fun!

Of course, that Les Halles has been replaced by some godawful shopping thing and there's Chatelet, which is it's own nightmare, but Au Pied de Couchon is still there.

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i have a vague memory of le disco in paris in the early 90's with my BFF before he came out as gay and it was one of the very best times of my whole life.

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"Yes of course half of the recent inflation wave was record corporate profits, we been saying!"

Only half?

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It’s stunning that the cops could maintain a secret mass grave behind their jail. It’s even more stunning that they only got caught after they covered up vehicular manslaughter.

Everyone involved in running that jail needs to be in jail.

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Who better than the guy who likes underage girl to succeed the 🐈‍⬛ grabber?

https://apple.news/AHkGzCMHUQl2owYxxanz0iQ

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Jan 22·edited Jan 22

So, he’s just … sending people to Rwanda? Even if they’re not from there?

Wow.

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He's late to the party. Australia's been sending people to Nauru and PNG for years. We did stop embarrassingly recently

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I've not seen anything reported that Rwanda actually is fine with this. You'd think the would be like "the fuck you say, we're not taking anyone from anywhere".

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Sunrise is an hour off yet, but the birds are already at the feeding stations. And I saw five ravens in the sky making their way to work, probably headed for the dumpster site down the road. They had that hoodie up over their heads, slouched over their coffee way about them, that Monday morning resignation. Feathery overachievers making me feel like a slug this morning. it’s about 20 below here, I think, and about 35 below in town.

Happy Monday everywonk. We’ve got this.

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I love your description of the ravens. 😁

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Yum, must try those Paris places - thanks! I know I've been to two or three of those and think I may have been to three more (they're certainly near haunts of mine).

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The most unusual restaurant I ever went to in Paris was in Montmartre. I don’t remember the name. They served one main course, fondue. You could order red or white wine, and it came in baby bottles (with slightly bigger holes in the nipples.) Seating was at two continuous long tables running down the sides of a single room. Women were assisted in stepping over the table to the wall side, purportedly to afford a quick view up their skirts, if they were wearing skirts. This has a historical precedent in the Can Can. The whole time we were there the waiters engaged everyone in jocular banter, in English and French. For all I know, teasing may have been available in other languages as well.

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Okay, don’t know how we missed the summer 2023 “Harvard morgue theft ring.” They just made leather out of people

Seriously, this simulation is fuckton crazy now...and who could have possibly guessed the ringleaders live in fucking New Hampshire? Bet they love TFG too...FUUUUCCCKKKKK!

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I was happy to see that the mention of Scranton was only because the grand jury was held there.

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I guess I'm a bad person because my first thought was "oh, Cool!"

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I did not find that particular detail at all surprising.

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Quote/

Apparently Trump was at his one of his Loathsome Dove rallies explaining that Nikki Haley did January 6. (He thinks she’s Nancy Pelosi, who everyone knows did January 6.)

/Quote

And according to Midas Touch, he and his enablers are now claiming that a) he was being "sarcastic", because they don't understand sarcasm; and/or b) it was a metaphor of some sort.

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At least one of those 13 unusual spots better be a dumpster.

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America First, German style.

(she is the gay boss of our right wing party AFD ... probably still believing she would survive when her party takes over the country)

https://twitter.com/FT/status/1749336112340824557 ---

Alice Weidel says the UK was 'dead right' in leaving the EU. Breaking a big national taboo, the far-right leader tells the FT she will call for a referendum on 'Dexit' — a German exit from the bloc — if elected

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i have been following the story of the secret AfD meeting.

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1. “Costs have come down substantially, and while corporations were quick to pass on their increased costs to consumers, they are surprisingly less quick to pass on their savings to consumers,” Liz Pancotti, a Groundwork strategic adviser and paper co-author, said. - "SUPRISINGLY?!? Hey, lady - I appreciate your work but if you're SURPRISED that companies did not pass cost savings onto consumers, then maybe analyzing business is not for you. No offense

2. "Reacher" S2 was OK, but was made worse by straying from the book so much. I've read every Reacher novel 5 times or more (LOVE 'EM!) and with all due respect, the TV writers screwed up what was a fantastic story. Here's hoping that doesn't happen in S3 (or didn't happen, as I think they've already filmed it)

.....ADDENDUM - don't waste your time on the latest Reacher novel, "The Secret". I think Lee Child is on the jacket in name only, and it shows.

3. I was going to tell the joke about the guy who buys a wallet made of human flesh but the more I got into typing it, the less funny it seemed. You're welcome

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founding

Harvard morgue theft ring made leather out of human skin? I did Nazi that coming.

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