Have you ever seen W.C. Fields' movie "It's a Gift?" In it he is a harried grocery store proprietor, and there is a long scene in which a blind customer (Mr. Muckle) comes in, swinging his cane wildly resulting in much disarray to all the carefully stacked merchandise.
Extra points, Martini, for closing the Christmas shopping show with the Jack Benny Program End Theme. Composed by the great Mahlon Merrick, the theme goes by the informal title "The J & M Stomp" (in honor of Jack and his wife Mary Livingstone), or "Jefferson Fox, I Love You" (don't ask, IDK). But over 65 years later that music still roams through my psyche . . .
It's funny--the YEEEEEESSSSSS??? guy was such a part of things that (though I was too young to see the show originally) somehow you always knew about this bit and it was funny to a kid and still now even when it's out of context.
With all due respect to Panera's CEO, Mr. Shaich (he seems well meaning), most CEOs of large corporations didn't achieve that position by having any shred of empathy and compassion, they ascended the ladder by being ruthlessly ambitious sociopaths, focused solely on making money for the shareholders so they can move up, and therapy is unlikely to be able to install any compassion or true respect for the labor units after the fact. Don't put CEOs on the couch to whine about how nobody appreciates them. Before they become CEO, make them work at the shittiest, lowest paying job in their empire, AND SUBSIST ONLY ON THEIR WAGES, for a year. Kind of like Undercover Boss, only they don't go home to their mansion after a shift and there's no dramatic reveal at the end.
I would argue most CEOs today don't understand the first thing about what their employees do. They come up through sales or accounting and usually have zero knowledge of the product and/or service the business is selling.
The nearest LQS [local quilt store] has banned my neuro-divergent spawn, on the potential he might knock someone down or damage something. I know 10yos aren't supposed to be running around a store, and he knows it too, but impulse control is really hard for him. It hurts.
"Ncuti Gatwa is already pure fire as the new Doctor. Here’s where I also remind everyone that the Doctor’s companion Jamie wore a kilt for three years! (The Daily Beast)"
The Oklahoma rural towns I had businesses in were decidedly NOT Hallmark movies. I could tell you toe-curling tales of poverty, drugs, unwanted babies, domestic violence, thievery, crime, death, and murder. I'll never understand the romantic fantasy of small towns; I lived in only one that could be described as a "success," with a little state college, a respectable size of manufacturing business, and a Walmart. The other 3 were nothing but dwindling resources and human habitation.
Bertie, my oldest, is infatuated with small town life because he’s never lived in one. Regina is a small city at 200,000 but it’s still a city, you can get a midnight pizza and an Uber and Starbucks. The grandparents live in the tiny city/large town I grew up in, and it’s a hellhole. And he wants smaller still. If he could move to the tiny village the Queen of Canada is holed up in he’d be thrilled. I lived in a place that size as a teen his age for a job. One day a coworker said “Watch that car. In ten minutes a red pickup will follow it. In an hour the car will be back, and in an hour and ten minutes the truck will be back.” So, mystified, I watched, and it happened just like she said. When I went all wide eyed at that, she told me it was because they were two affair partners and the whole community knew.
THAT is a small town right there. You can’t get ANY pizza but they sure do all got grills up in one another’s business.
Scranton used to be 140K when I was a kid I always thought of it as a "small town" and never worried about walking around at night. Now it might be more like 75k but it still feels the same to me. I was stunned when I found out just how small "small towns" really are.
It’s a sliding scale, isn’t it. A suburb of Montreal, which is by no means Canada’s largest city, is the size of Regina. But here, where the smallest city is probably 5000 people, we are HUGE. And yes, we are small, but the states nearest to us, their biggest city is like 35,000 people or so. We might as well be Metropolis in comparison! Jeez, I think Nodak’s capital is like the size of Moose Jaw. (Is too a real place!)
I hear you. I live in a town of 8,000. Small college, some manufacturing and a lot of outdoor recreation. My kids can walk to school up until high school. It's no utopia, but it has what we need and is convenient. Plus, clean air and water.
My CT hometown small town (pop's bit over 4,000 currently) isn't doing so bad, but it neighbors the town with UConn's main campus. It's easier to find your way out than usual. The bigger town we moved to when I was 16 was and is actually worse off, more like those small towns of yours. It also looks more like hallmark small towns, with an actual downtown area. The old mills are mostly shut down.
Well, to be fair, that Business Insider headline is at least *a little* misleading, as Shaich immediately follows that up with, essentially, "of course they don't and it's crazy to expect them to". Not to cape too hard for the company that has a body count attached to their hypercaffeinated lemonade.
FARA comes to mind as well, especially considering how many stamps Tuck'ems passport has for that Country along with Melanoma endorsement for VP...UGH!
From the “Things you will never hear today in the MSM” The latest Reuters poll
“In the seven states where the election was closest in 2020 -- Wisconsin, Pennsylvania, Arizona, Georgia, Nevada, North Carolina and Michigan -- Biden had a 4-point lead among Americans who said they were sure to vote.”
This holiday season, don't forget to remind your appliances that they are loved. Refrigerator suicide is no laughing matter. Sigh . . . well, at least the new refrigerator should be available on January 1, and I have plenty of coolers.
In yesterday's mail was a bill from the county for just short of $4000, due by 12/31, for property tax. Almost had a heart attack. Certain that this is the second payment and that I already paid it back in September, I called the number given on the bill; "Due to an unusually high volume of calls, we are unable to take your call immediately" which is what they ALWAYS say. After waiting on hold for another 5 minutes, another recorded message told me that I could request a call-back without losing my place in the que, but "due to the blah blah blah" it might not be until tomorrow. And they still haven't gotten back to me about my Homeowners' Tax Credit (for poors and geezers) and I was half-hoping for a sizeable refund. Why can't they acknowledge payment when they get it? The only way you know they have received and processed it is by waiting 6 months until the next bill comes.
I went through the same yesterday in San Diego. It hadn't shown up in the banks record as pending... I walked in the bank also. I was freaking out... I called their #... Was on hold for a while... But actually was answered right after I was told that there were several in front of me. They already had my info pulled up to tell me. The interaction was painless. And nice person on the phone.
that's where I looked first, but doing an electronic check seemed more trouble than it was worth, so I used my credit card, and that is where I found record of the transaction.
I just finished filling out forms and copying backup for an appeal to a property tax increase on my mom's house. Because she's old (88), I have power of attorney and I'm the trustee of her trust which contains her house. So we refinanced her house a year ago and they decided that having my name on the new mortgage meant that it had changed ownership so it needs to be reassessed. We're in CA and her property tax is based off of the value of the house when purchased (1978) plus 2% per year. They want to increase that number by $800k
I also went the route of asking questions and trying to get someone on the phone to talk to me. They don't even make you wait they just tell you to leave a message and they will call back next business day. Shocking news - They do not. Fuck this nonsense!
Oh, they legitimately always have a lot of callers on hold, but that's only because they employ as few call takers as they can get away with. They'd rather make you wait hours than pay another salary. You're right, though - it's not unusual.
Mine gave up and just tel you they're open from 8-5pm and they can't answer the phone right now so leave a message and they'll call the next business day - and then they don't. It's a sweet racket
It’s Jack Benny, storekeepers beware. 😆
https://open.substack.com/pub/martiniambassador/p/jack-benny-does-the-christmas-dinner
Robber : "Your money of your life! ...I said, your money or your life!"
Benny : "I'm thinking! ...I'm thinking!"
Have you ever seen W.C. Fields' movie "It's a Gift?" In it he is a harried grocery store proprietor, and there is a long scene in which a blind customer (Mr. Muckle) comes in, swinging his cane wildly resulting in much disarray to all the carefully stacked merchandise.
I have not, but sounds like something I would find amusing. I will look for it.
I thought he invented Jenga for a second there.
A classic show.
Extra points, Martini, for closing the Christmas shopping show with the Jack Benny Program End Theme. Composed by the great Mahlon Merrick, the theme goes by the informal title "The J & M Stomp" (in honor of Jack and his wife Mary Livingstone), or "Jefferson Fox, I Love You" (don't ask, IDK). But over 65 years later that music still roams through my psyche . . .
Grocery shopping seems like a Rochester job.
Ah, but there is a reason… click link to find out 😘
Rochester golf day!
That's a neat sight gag. Thanks!
Jack Benny was the best. I loved his run-ins with the "YEEEEEES???" guy played by Frank Nelson.
It's funny--the YEEEEEESSSSSS??? guy was such a part of things that (though I was too young to see the show originally) somehow you always knew about this bit and it was funny to a kid and still now even when it's out of context.
I loved his over the top sarcasm, and how hapless Benny had to keep enduring it--two comic greats playing off of each other perfectly.
Mel Blanc appeared as several characters, including a Mexican named Cy and the railroad conductor calling out "All aboard for Anaheim , Azusa, and
Cooooocamonga!".
https://youtu.be/JA_r1Ynl4Ls?si=rtDbtnTZZ5bwoWZw
Nelson definitely shines in this episode. I’ve put a link to it on my write up if you’d like to watch.
Thanks!
From the moment Ncuti Gatwa appeared on screen I was completely on board with Doctor 15.
I can't wait for the Xmas special and the new series.
If I were The Onion, I would reprint that Panera article without changing anything.
No one, before or since, did a better dead-pan double take than Jack Benny (who turns 39 next Valentine's Day).
With all due respect to Panera's CEO, Mr. Shaich (he seems well meaning), most CEOs of large corporations didn't achieve that position by having any shred of empathy and compassion, they ascended the ladder by being ruthlessly ambitious sociopaths, focused solely on making money for the shareholders so they can move up, and therapy is unlikely to be able to install any compassion or true respect for the labor units after the fact. Don't put CEOs on the couch to whine about how nobody appreciates them. Before they become CEO, make them work at the shittiest, lowest paying job in their empire, AND SUBSIST ONLY ON THEIR WAGES, for a year. Kind of like Undercover Boss, only they don't go home to their mansion after a shift and there's no dramatic reveal at the end.
I would argue most CEOs today don't understand the first thing about what their employees do. They come up through sales or accounting and usually have zero knowledge of the product and/or service the business is selling.
The nearest LQS [local quilt store] has banned my neuro-divergent spawn, on the potential he might knock someone down or damage something. I know 10yos aren't supposed to be running around a store, and he knows it too, but impulse control is really hard for him. It hurts.
"Ncuti Gatwa is already pure fire as the new Doctor. Here’s where I also remind everyone that the Doctor’s companion Jamie wore a kilt for three years! (The Daily Beast)"
Aye, and that he did!
The Oklahoma rural towns I had businesses in were decidedly NOT Hallmark movies. I could tell you toe-curling tales of poverty, drugs, unwanted babies, domestic violence, thievery, crime, death, and murder. I'll never understand the romantic fantasy of small towns; I lived in only one that could be described as a "success," with a little state college, a respectable size of manufacturing business, and a Walmart. The other 3 were nothing but dwindling resources and human habitation.
Bertie, my oldest, is infatuated with small town life because he’s never lived in one. Regina is a small city at 200,000 but it’s still a city, you can get a midnight pizza and an Uber and Starbucks. The grandparents live in the tiny city/large town I grew up in, and it’s a hellhole. And he wants smaller still. If he could move to the tiny village the Queen of Canada is holed up in he’d be thrilled. I lived in a place that size as a teen his age for a job. One day a coworker said “Watch that car. In ten minutes a red pickup will follow it. In an hour the car will be back, and in an hour and ten minutes the truck will be back.” So, mystified, I watched, and it happened just like she said. When I went all wide eyed at that, she told me it was because they were two affair partners and the whole community knew.
THAT is a small town right there. You can’t get ANY pizza but they sure do all got grills up in one another’s business.
Scranton used to be 140K when I was a kid I always thought of it as a "small town" and never worried about walking around at night. Now it might be more like 75k but it still feels the same to me. I was stunned when I found out just how small "small towns" really are.
It’s a sliding scale, isn’t it. A suburb of Montreal, which is by no means Canada’s largest city, is the size of Regina. But here, where the smallest city is probably 5000 people, we are HUGE. And yes, we are small, but the states nearest to us, their biggest city is like 35,000 people or so. We might as well be Metropolis in comparison! Jeez, I think Nodak’s capital is like the size of Moose Jaw. (Is too a real place!)
I hear you. I live in a town of 8,000. Small college, some manufacturing and a lot of outdoor recreation. My kids can walk to school up until high school. It's no utopia, but it has what we need and is convenient. Plus, clean air and water.
My CT hometown small town (pop's bit over 4,000 currently) isn't doing so bad, but it neighbors the town with UConn's main campus. It's easier to find your way out than usual. The bigger town we moved to when I was 16 was and is actually worse off, more like those small towns of yours. It also looks more like hallmark small towns, with an actual downtown area. The old mills are mostly shut down.
Well, to be fair, that Business Insider headline is at least *a little* misleading, as Shaich immediately follows that up with, essentially, "of course they don't and it's crazy to expect them to". Not to cape too hard for the company that has a body count attached to their hypercaffeinated lemonade.
FARA comes to mind as well, especially considering how many stamps Tuck'ems passport has for that Country along with Melanoma endorsement for VP...UGH!
I'm sure there is a brilliant legal strategy in here somewhere..
𝑈.𝑆. 𝐷𝑖𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑖𝑐𝑡 𝐽𝑢𝑑𝑔𝑒 𝐵𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑙 𝐻𝑜𝑤𝑒𝑙𝑙 𝑤𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑒𝑑 𝐺𝑖𝑢𝑙𝑖𝑎𝑛𝑖'𝑠 𝑙𝑎𝑤𝑦𝑒𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑟𝑒𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑘𝑠 ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑐𝑙𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑚𝑎𝑑𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑟𝑒𝑝𝑜𝑟𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑎𝑏𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑅𝑢𝑏𝑦 𝐹𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑚𝑎𝑛 𝑎𝑛𝑑 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑑𝑎𝑢𝑔ℎ𝑡𝑒𝑟, 𝑊𝑎𝑛𝑑𝑟𝑒𝑎 “𝑆ℎ𝑎𝑦𝑒” 𝑀𝑜𝑠𝑠 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝑎 𝑑𝑎𝑦 𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑙𝑖𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑚𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 “𝑑𝑒𝑓𝑎𝑚𝑎𝑡𝑜𝑟𝑦 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑠 𝑎𝑏𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑚 𝑦𝑒𝑡 𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛.”
𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝑗𝑢𝑑𝑔𝑒 𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑒𝑑 𝑖𝑛𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑑𝑢𝑙𝑜𝑢𝑠, 𝑎𝑠𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝐺𝑖𝑢𝑙𝑖𝑎𝑛𝑖’𝑠 𝑙𝑎𝑤𝑦𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑏𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑐𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑜𝑓 ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑜𝑝𝑒𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑠 𝑐𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝐹𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑚𝑎𝑛 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑀𝑜𝑠𝑠 “𝑔𝑜𝑜𝑑 𝑝𝑒𝑜𝑝𝑙𝑒” 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑚𝑒𝑟 𝑚𝑎𝑦𝑜𝑟 𝑟𝑒𝑝𝑒𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑢𝑛𝑓𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑒𝑔𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑣𝑜𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑓𝑟𝑎𝑢𝑑.
𝐺𝑖𝑢𝑙𝑖𝑎𝑛𝑖'𝑠 𝑙𝑎𝑤𝑦𝑒𝑟, 𝐽𝑜𝑠𝑒𝑝ℎ 𝑆𝑖𝑏𝑙𝑒𝑦, 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑐𝑒𝑑𝑒𝑑 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑝𝑜𝑖𝑛𝑡 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑡𝑜𝑙𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑗𝑢𝑑𝑔𝑒 ℎ𝑒 𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑐𝑢𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑠 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑐𝑙𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑡, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑎𝑑𝑑𝑒𝑑: “𝐼 𝑐𝑎𝑛'𝑡 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑡𝑟𝑜𝑙 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 ℎ𝑒 𝑑𝑜𝑒𝑠." 𝐻𝑒 𝑎𝑙𝑠𝑜 𝑎𝑟𝑔𝑢𝑒𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑚𝑎𝑦𝑜𝑟’𝑠 𝑎𝑔𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑑 ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑡ℎ 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑐𝑒𝑟𝑛𝑠 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑦𝑠 𝑖𝑛 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑡 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑒𝑛𝑔𝑖𝑛𝑔.
That's a "you" problem, Joe. Dry him out and get some Ritalin down his gullet.
From the “Things you will never hear today in the MSM” The latest Reuters poll
“In the seven states where the election was closest in 2020 -- Wisconsin, Pennsylvania, Arizona, Georgia, Nevada, North Carolina and Michigan -- Biden had a 4-point lead among Americans who said they were sure to vote.”
Interesting article in Salon about the Hallmark movies showing rural life to be better.
As counterprogramming they could always have people watch Arachnaphobia.
This holiday season, don't forget to remind your appliances that they are loved. Refrigerator suicide is no laughing matter. Sigh . . . well, at least the new refrigerator should be available on January 1, and I have plenty of coolers.
I feel your pain. I swear things always break down on holiday weekends around here.
The struggle is real...
at least your fridge popped its clogs in the winter, when you may have natural refrigeration as I do here.
It drops into the low 50s, upper 40s, unless we get a good frost night. I'm hoping for unseasonably cold.
“Of course, these people all think Trump is their savior”
And this is where I stop feeling bad for them
In yesterday's mail was a bill from the county for just short of $4000, due by 12/31, for property tax. Almost had a heart attack. Certain that this is the second payment and that I already paid it back in September, I called the number given on the bill; "Due to an unusually high volume of calls, we are unable to take your call immediately" which is what they ALWAYS say. After waiting on hold for another 5 minutes, another recorded message told me that I could request a call-back without losing my place in the que, but "due to the blah blah blah" it might not be until tomorrow. And they still haven't gotten back to me about my Homeowners' Tax Credit (for poors and geezers) and I was half-hoping for a sizeable refund. Why can't they acknowledge payment when they get it? The only way you know they have received and processed it is by waiting 6 months until the next bill comes.
I went through the same yesterday in San Diego. It hadn't shown up in the banks record as pending... I walked in the bank also. I was freaking out... I called their #... Was on hold for a while... But actually was answered right after I was told that there were several in front of me. They already had my info pulled up to tell me. The interaction was painless. And nice person on the phone.
glad to hear that you were treated the way we all should be. may all your interactions with THEM be as painless and easily resolved as this, my friend
Your bank records should show the $4,000 withdrawal.
that's where I looked first, but doing an electronic check seemed more trouble than it was worth, so I used my credit card, and that is where I found record of the transaction.
I just finished filling out forms and copying backup for an appeal to a property tax increase on my mom's house. Because she's old (88), I have power of attorney and I'm the trustee of her trust which contains her house. So we refinanced her house a year ago and they decided that having my name on the new mortgage meant that it had changed ownership so it needs to be reassessed. We're in CA and her property tax is based off of the value of the house when purchased (1978) plus 2% per year. They want to increase that number by $800k
I also went the route of asking questions and trying to get someone on the phone to talk to me. They don't even make you wait they just tell you to leave a message and they will call back next business day. Shocking news - They do not. Fuck this nonsense!
tl/dr: I feel your pain
Whenever I call them, they have "an unusual volume of calls", EVERY TIME. Call me cynical, but I suspect that they are not being entirely candid.
Oh, they legitimately always have a lot of callers on hold, but that's only because they employ as few call takers as they can get away with. They'd rather make you wait hours than pay another salary. You're right, though - it's not unusual.
what I suspected
Mine gave up and just tel you they're open from 8-5pm and they can't answer the phone right now so leave a message and they'll call the next business day - and then they don't. It's a sweet racket