Donald Trump did not talk! Donald Trump shut his fucking mouth! Donald Trump took his lawyer's advice, at least from several years ago!
“Dowd told Trump: “Don’t testify. It’s either that or an orange jumpsuit.” Trump: “I’ll be a real good witness,” Dowd: “You are not a good witness. Mr. President, I’m afraid I just can’t help you.” The next morning, Dowd resigned.”
— Jake Tapper (@Jake Tapper) 1536075140
This has nothing to do with Trump's FBI raid or the criminal investigation in Georgia. It's always confusing, because Trump could end up criminally and/or civilly liable in about 109 different affairs at any given time.
But in New York state, Donald Trump went for his deposition today with New York Attorney General Letitia James, who is leading a civil investigation into the shady ass hinky ass real estate valuations used by the Trump Organization for tax and business purposes, and he pleaded the fucking Fifth.
Which reminds us of how two things can be true at once:
1) Pleading the Fifth is fine, a perfectly constitutional thing to do. It's there for a reason.
2) When Donald Trump does it, it means he's totally fuckin' guilty. "Allegedly," hahahaha OK.
So this is what happened when Trump got to AG James's office:
In a lengthy statement, Trump denied wrongdoing, accused the U.S. government of unfairly targeting him and said he would refuse to answer questions, citing his Fifth Amendment right not to incriminate himself.
Sure thing.
As Donald Trump explained in 2016:
"So there are five people taking the Fifth Amendment, like you see on the mob, right? You see the mob takes the Fifth. If you're innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?"
Right.
But he just had to this time, because here's why:
In a statement made Wednesday, just an hour after Trump arrived at James' headquarters in New York City, the former president said, "I once asked, 'If you're innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?' Now I know the answer to that question."
"When your family, your company and all the people in your orbit have become the targets of an unfounded, politically motivated Witch Hunt supported by lawyers, prosecutors and the Fake News Media, you have no choice," Trump said.
Gotcha. He said he definitely has no choice now, because of that Mar-a-Lago raid. (Which we hear really scared poor Eric. )
But he "did nothing wrong," he said.
“Trump, who once indicated innocent people don't plead the Fifth, defends doing so while sitting with lawyers from New York Attorney General Letitia James' office. "I once asked, 'If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?' Now I know the answer to that question."”
— Kaitlan Collins (@Kaitlan Collins) 1660140789
The Washington Post notes that Trump, Ivanka, and Don Jr. were all supposed to testify back on July 14. But then mommy died and they had to bury her in a great big giant shoebox on the golf course, as is the tradition. Vanky and the face that sank a thousand ships reportedly had their depositions in the past few days and didn't take the criminal's way out like daddy did. (When Eric testified in 2020, he pleaded the Fifth 500 fucking times yes we said 500. )
Trump is still being as mature and grown-up as ever about James's investigation:
In a post on Trump’s social media service, Truth Social, early Wednesday, Trump continued his attacks on James’s investigation, calling the Black law enforcement official “racist” and saying he was seeing her “for a continuation of the greatest Witch Hunt in U.S. History!”
Ah yes, that's been Trump's thing for a while now, that he's a victim of racial discrimination at the hands of Tish James. We're sure one day a poignant feature film will be made about how he persevered, despite all the racism.
Point is, Donald Trump's week of winning just keeps on keepin' on, what with the FBI raid and having to give Congress his taxes and now this.
It must be Infrastructure Week or something, in his butt.
[ Washington Post / Newsweek ]
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