396 Comments

Dear Leader, Sum Dim Trump.

Expand full comment

A frog relaxing by the side of a lake was snatched up and gobbled down whole by a passing gull,. Swimming through the gull's alimentary canal, the frog finally came to the gulls anus and forced his head out through that aperture. The frog was surprised, and shaken to learn that the gull, who was trying to digest him, was flying over a thousand feet above the lake's rocky shore.

"Say, Mr. Gull," the frog croaked in fear, "You wouldn't shit me now, would you?"

Seems like every day, stories coming out of the Trump Administration remind me of that gull and recreate the emotions of that frog.

Expand full comment

"That's a Parkway, isn't it?"

Expand full comment

I've thought that for several months.

In fact, I'm kind of dreading when Trump suddenly stops Tweeting inanities and starts staying on point when orating. That's when I'll be sure the evil old troll has kicked the bucket, and his kids have sent in a celebrity double to handle all of Trump's personal appearances.

Expand full comment

Hair Furor knows what Panama is and where it's at. It was the last hat he wore to cover his disappearing hair, and it's in the back of one of his closets, needing re-blocking.

Expand full comment

Yep, in vain.

Expand full comment

And it was eventually taken over and completed by the united States, and it takes a really special kind of brain-numbed cretin to not figure out that was the "we" to which Trump referred.

Expand full comment

Nope. Next?

Expand full comment

Aesop: "Hmm, I like the way I phrased it."

Expand full comment

Are 35 story condo towers with unit prices starting at $1,000,000 for a one bedroom going to be considered infrastructure?

Expand full comment

"This is the least stupid thing President Donald Trump will do this week."

Dammit! Don't say it out loud! You're gonna jinx it!

Expand full comment

Only Trump would try to take credit for a construction job that was completed before he was even born.

Expand full comment

Yep. That was beautiful.

Expand full comment

AOT,K? Oh, I suck so bad at this.

Expand full comment

Whew! It's a good thing President Barack Obama isn't reducing our stature in the eyes of the world.

Expand full comment

To be fair, Obama didn't build the Panama Canal.

That was shiftless on his part.

Expand full comment