36 Comments

They must have changed it on the new ones.

Expand full comment

Either that or he really dug Idiotcracy.

Expand full comment

Thanks for the corrections. I thought Juan was born on a Navy base in Panama, hence, "controlled territory". So I guess we'd be enduring Orly Taitz, World Net Daily, Trumpette and the other birthers whether Obama or McCain won. (sigh)

Expand full comment

So if the number was there, you'd be A-OK with Obama being a real Merican. Yeah, right.

Expand full comment

Aside from shooting large mammals, and of course producing that lovely batch of almost-entirely-caucasian kids ... what, exactly, does Palin do better than Obama?

Expand full comment

In AZ, even if it's not worth doing at all, it's still worth doing well.

Expand full comment

Can't wait to see McCain's long-form whatever from Panama. Whatever he's got, it won't be good enough for AZ, or for the Twin-Tower Turd.

Expand full comment

Awww...thanks.

Expand full comment

I just measured the retardation level of his comments and extrapolated from there. It's sort of like how those serial killer experts can profile the killer from the footprints he leaves behind.

Expand full comment

Arizona is famous for great, empty, yawning chasms. They have one that's actually in the rocks!

Expand full comment

Well natch...we're Wonketteers.

Expand full comment

No doctors name? No parent's birthplace. You don't exist in Birther World. Now I see why you're FinallyHappy.

Expand full comment

Please sir, you are a wet fart in a crowded church. You make coherent arguments like Trump's scalp makes hair. The universe holds its breath against the day you spawn. When you get a boner, an angel dies.

You are the clunky backbeat of white bread, mayonnaise quaffing America...everyone can dance to it, but why bother? Your Rascal batteries have gone flat and your high-fructose corn syrup has gone sour. You are every butt-cracked, back titty'd bottom dweller that staggered out of Walmart under the weight of Chinese goods and STILL can't understand where the jobs have gone.

Your father's wedding proposal to your mother was, "YOU'RE WHAT?" When your parents got divorced, the congregation cried..."Are they still brother and sister?!" If I could go back in time, I would give your father a condom...no, I would encourage him to join the priesthood. That way he would be less likely to rape relatives. Speaking of which, can you prove that you didn't rape that girl back in 1991?

Your sauce is weak, your spunk is thin. Your best friend must impregnate your wife since you are incapable of maintaining an erection. This may be bad for your self-esteem, but good overall for the species.

You are so repulsive that Briebart won't even let you suck his dick, even with your total lack of teeth. Glen Beck anal rapes you with chalk and you honor him for it.

You are a loser, a punk, a malodorous pervert, a stain on the fabric of our nation. You are everything wrong about our nation.

You sir, blow goats.

Expand full comment

I'm sure it's all because they don't want to run on "better ideas".

Expand full comment

Adoptees are fucked.

Expand full comment