10 Comments
User's avatar
Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

"Why would he run away, and then go into a shed? We suspect foul play, and even more, we have a theory: it was the same guy O.J. Simpson is looking for. If he has any leads, we'll contact you ASAP."

Expand full comment
Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

I know, it's horrible! There was room in there for two more! People like that deserve to be put out of business.

--Koch Bros

Expand full comment
Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

"I didn't do it, IT WAS <i>THE ONE-ARMED MAN!</i>"

Expand full comment
Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

“We had a dog that was a digger and we didn't know about it. He dug a hole and Sherman and Parker somehow got out of the hole. We are out looking for them right now … my wife, my girls are out looking for them. And they just found them! Ah, excellent. All's well. Wait, no, hey oh no! Some illegal aliens just stole all of the dogs! STOP, DOG THIEVES!! And it looks like they just headed across the border! And oh my cell phone is about to " CLICK

Expand full comment
bobbert's avatar

It's only "odd" if you assume that the owners of the dog-boarding facility, who kept 28 goddam dogs in a "shed" and turned the maintenance of the facility over to some rando Flake, gave a shit about anything except the boarding fees.

Expand full comment
fuflans's avatar

ok. i'm heading over to TLO for some fashion and snark now.

see you all later.

Expand full comment
Msgr MΩment classic ☑️'s avatar

What an amateur. That's not even enough for a vest, let alone a fur coat.

Expand full comment
Msgr MΩment classic ☑️'s avatar

and are registered at conception to vote.

Expand full comment
PubOption's avatar

If a dog chewed through the power cord, there should be one electrocuted dog and 19 with heat exhaustion. Something doesn't add up.

Expand full comment
PubOption's avatar

A new monster, the chupaperro.

Expand full comment