Barack Obama Was Probably Banging Jill Kelley Obviously, Except For How He Is Gay

Well this is much better! Tampa nonsense queen Jill Kelley and her evil twin visited the White House three times this year, an administration official told AP. Obviously, this means President Barack Obama has been boning both of them, in the SitRoom, while eating popcorn and laughing while watching Christopher Stevens die. He did this because he is a murderer, obviously, but also probably to throw people off the scent of his Muslim homosexual marriage. 

An Obama administration official says a Tampa Bay socialite whose emails triggered the eventual downfall of CIA director David Petraeus visited the White House three times this year with her sister, twice eating in the Executive Mansion mess.

The official says that Jill Kelley, who initiated an investigation that ultimately unveiled Petraeus' extramarital affair, and her sister had two "courtesy" meals at the White House mess as guests of a mid-level White House aide. Kelley and her family also received a White House tour. The visits occurred during the past three months.

The number of visits (three) means that Kelley and her sister are now official White House spokespeople, just like Hilary Rosen, and the Obama administration owns everything (thousands of pages of emails, plus "diplomatic inviolability") they have ever said.

[ AP ]