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Bend Over, It's Time To Cram Your Throat With A Piece Of Gay Marriage History!
Official Friend of Wonkette For Real Thom Kostura helped you put a homosexxican ring on your beloved's finger -- what else you put a ring on is protected by Lawrence v. Texas -- and he also can help you pretty up that spot over your couch!
Let's take a gander, and then buy us some art!
First, here are Thom and his husband, Ijpe, the Tennessee gay marriage plaintiffs who made God and Kim Davis cry, because they are easy on the eyes:
Oh yeah, that's it right there.
Now here are some paintings, which Thom Kostura left out in the rain.
No, he really left them out in the rain. Thom Kostura's co-creator is none other than GOD!!!
Now I could put on my art critic hat and pontificate a while about the authorship of happenstance and what a monster Jackson Pollock was, and I could throw in some pretty bullshit about water from the Tao Te Ching, and we could all have a nice little jaw about postmodernism and why I hate Robert Rauschenberg, but I do not want to. Art criticking is the worst!
Let's just agree this one picks up the accents in your throw pillows
and this one goes with your marble countertops
and that they're all really lovely, and Thom Kostura prettied up your apartment AND helped you file joint taxes, so you should buy his paintings (which are lovely) and your Wonkette gets a cut.