123 Comments

It always amazes me how many people think they get away with lying to people, whose job it is, to hear a lot of people lie to them.

Expand full comment

Can't build muscle tissue out of pasta.

Expand full comment

As long as you do not classify Public Defenders in Florida as "Lawyers", I agree with you.

Expand full comment

Okay, but - and hear me out - is there any wiggle room here? Because I feel like you’re leaving some wiggle room and that could be important, hypothetically.

Expand full comment

I grew up in the West Indies we eat beans with our food a great deal.

Expand full comment

Seriously. How are you going to help me if you don’t know where the bodies are? It’s just common se-okay, I see the problem.

Expand full comment

Did I tell you about the time that I invented the moon?

Expand full comment

Good one!

Expand full comment

What do you mean? It's on every opinion signed "Brett Kavanaugh" already!

Oh you meant literally.

Expand full comment

can I still lie to the priest in the confessional though? I'm writing erotic fiction and I just need to bounce some ideas off him.

Expand full comment

Everyone understands the movie "They Live" where Roddy Piper smashes all the transmitters and suddenly everyone can see the monsters in plain view.

But everyone seems to ignore the real-life version and pretend FOX News is not there 24/7/365 constantly broadcasting the opposite of sanity, putting a massive thumb on every political scale.

I have a sibling who claims to never watch FOX News. Weirdly enough, her opinions seem to match FOX!

Because literally every person that sits in her hair salon chair, and posts on her Faceplop timeline parrots the FOX Talking Points into her face. FOX spreads virally.

Expand full comment

Good, kill it once and for all. It's cruelty for cruelty's sake.

Expand full comment

"I've got it! Peter Cushing! We have to drive a stake through his heart!""I'll get a stake!""I'll get a cushion."..."Oh no, we don't have any steaks. All we have is this vegetarian sausage."

Expand full comment

i love this so much and i want the cat to be doing this.

Expand full comment

Well done, and my thoughts exactly.

Expand full comment