281 Comments

After you stop victim blaming

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Yes that's very true. But I still cannot imagine not wanting to find out if I have an std or if I'm pregnant.

I personally never gave a damn if people believed me, or what they thought of me. So although shy, I was not repressed when it came to violence or injustice.

My friend's sister was raped when she was 15 or 16. Her name was kept out of the news but since I was friends with her brother, he told me and a few others. I never repeated the story to anyone else. Never revealed her name. She went to the hospital. According to my friend the police were very kind. The perp was quickly arrested (he was a juvenile as well) and he was sent to juvy. This was 1985 and in a small somewhat rural suburb. She went on to be a lawyer. I'm told she's successful.

Hopefully my own girls are empowered and not intimidated by power or fame. Nor will they ever have an abusive partner, get a bad Uber driver, walk down the wrong street, have a violent coworker or neighbor etc...

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I totally understand. I guess I just would've thought more than 1 out of 50 alleged victims would have filed a police report and/or gone to a hospital/dr.

Thank you for all you do. Volunteers like you are invaluable.

Happy New Year

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So people have never falsely accused others of a crime? Especially famous or rich people?

Grow the fuck up.

Women are not babies who cannot defend themselves and cower at what others may think of them, or say about them.

And furthermore we have jurisprudence in this country. People are innocent until proven guilty.

You don't know my history. You don't know if I've been the victim of being drugged w/o my consent. You don't know if I've been molested or raped or physically assaulted. Typing in all caps doesn't help your debating skills.

I support victims of rape.

I don't support liars.

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I am not victim blaming. I clearly said that being stupid does not mean the stupid person deserves to be raped. Nobody deserves to be raped, no matter how stupid they are. Read it again.

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I burned out on rape activism after 2 years, but I appreciate the "thank you."Happy New Year, as well, to you and yours!

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I hope so too, and if you have raised empowered daughters then I commend you. Sadly, I know too many women, young and old, who have no idea how to stand up for themselves and who cannot handle any form of confrontation. I know many mature women who have never even had the nerve to ask for a raise, even though their male colleagues do it and get one. They were raised to be "feminine and submissive" and to believe that they only have value as wives and mothers.

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You are the reason women don't report rape. Also, you make a great many assumptions in your post. It's like you are arguing with multiple strawmen. Argue with what I wrote, not what you imagine I wrote.

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You were very lucky. Similar thing happened to me. I think the guy who rolled the joint had laced the pot with something. I was never in to drugs and that experience further instilled a stronger dislike of them. After that, I was often the designated driver.

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Stop insulting women.

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Stop insulting women.

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I'm insulting victim blamers. Your guilt is showing

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Thank you. I'm not sure though. We raised them to be kind and considerate but to question everything and everyone. To not be afraid to ask questions or to stick up for themselves or those they care about or causes important to them. I thought when our youngest recently graduated from college I'd worry less. I don't show my concern outwardly. They both love to travel. Our eldest did 1 yr internship in Hong Kong and a summer in NYC. Younger girl did an internship in Bali.

It's difficult for women. I think more so in U.S. than in other western nations. We don't have a lot of support that women in other countries have like paid maternity leave or good affordable (sometimes free) child care. And although ACA is a good thing, our healthcare system leaves something to be desired when compared with other countries. We also don't have enough women in certain professions. Things are changing for the better but not fast enough for me.

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I am not blaming the victims, but I still say it's stupid to take pills offered by anyone, particularly an unrelated man........

You wrote that. It is victim blaming. I'm not saying those choices arent unwise, I'm saying that brinig them up in this context is victim blaming.

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The only women I'm insulting are victim blamers.

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Women using their reasoning faculties is very different than your want of shaming those women.

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