385 Comments
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Marc Berrenson's avatar

Think: "Trump will become a sane person "when pigs fly."

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Marc Berrenson's avatar

The dirigible is porcine or pig-like. Work on basic reading skills.

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Lisa's avatar

They don't even have to punch him in the face before he changes his tune. They just have to look him in the face. Case in point: China. From D.C. he accuses China of raping the US. In China, he admires them for taking advantage of the US for their own self interest. What a pussy.

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Lisa's avatar

Or in a bowl of salad or something healthy.

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Feeling Groovy's avatar

But who will they give the responsibility to? Pence? Ryan? McConnell? Kelley? I don't trust any of them with that kind of power. Instead of talking about the football we need to talk about getting rid of the nuclear weapons.

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(((fka_donnie_d))), sick SOB's avatar

Again, how? They have no authority to give orders to the Air Force

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Black Cat's avatar

I don't know... if they all secretly hate him, and his approval is so abysmal, why not simply impeach? They all still love their little Pence don't they?

And, why has their been no outcry about Trump berating the USA while in China? Obama never said anything like what Trump said and was excoriated non-stop for hating the USA and going on apology tours, etc. etc.

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DrCasbahJazz's avatar

Remember in _Goodfellas_ when Henry is in the shower and hears the news report on the radio about the Lufthansa heist and he's all "JIMMMMYYYYYYYYYYY!"While I'm not currently showering (which would make it inadvisable to comment), BOBBBYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

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TakingAmes's avatar

Schmaltzy Zeppelin is your punk-polka band name of the week.

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Claire's avatar

I have no idea because I don't know who's in charge of conveying the codes to the football. But Congress does have authority - in fact, sole authority - to declare war. If after these hearings Congress decides to pass legislation make it clear that Congress also has sole authority to approve a first nuclear strike, then I assume some career person somewhere in the government knows how to keep the codes out of Trump's hands. What's the Air Force going to do exactly, shoot Bob Corker? Follow illegal nuking orders from someone who doesn't even have the codes anymore?

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Mr. Yuk, Human Bean's avatar

You're scary good at that.

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the_steamer's avatar

Signed Epstein's mother.

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Doloras Funkette's avatar

Also Kissinger. How IS that evil fuck still walking around stealing oxygen?

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Doloras Funkette's avatar

Maybe he's like Divine, and every time he gets high he needs to eat a cake, wait, no, two cakes. And a roast.

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Mr. Tusks, Esq.'s avatar

I'm fairly certain there's already an off-the-books plan ensuring that lil Donnie doesn't get to launch nukes all on his own.

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Mr. Tusks, Esq.'s avatar

Dude. I got the joke. I guess mine wasn't as good.

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