Boooooooo! Tabs, Tues., June 9, 2026
Boooooooooooo!
Good morning! Who’s ready for news?
The Knicks lost last night and ended a 13-game winning streak, because Donald Trump was there, and everything he breathes on or farts on or shits on dies. [Inquirer]
Good news, though, nobody has ever been booed as much as Trump was last night. [Washington Post]
Donald Trump is telling himself they were cheering him, though. [Daily Beast]
In related news of delusional people who think they’re wanted, UFC head Dana White thinks Trump’s birthday bouncy house cage match for human trash is going to get “Super Bowl numbers.” So that’s sad. [MMA Junkie]
Mike Johnson is reading his bootlicking lines for Daddy, says the California election “stinks to high heaven” and suggests what’s happening there is so “diabolical” you could never even prove it! Eat shit, Sunday School boy. [CNN]
And Donald Trump’s name is now GONE from the Kennedy Center website. These lawsuits matter, y’all. [Washington Post]
Aaron Schock’s comeback tour looks … very grifty! [Politico]
Prefer a non-Substack subscription? The button below will take any amount of your choosing at Paypal — let me know if you want the newsletter subscription too! they’re separate! — or we have a Patreon too.
Professional Chubby Bunny player Tom Homan threatening to flood New York City with ICE, and right here as the World Cup is about to start too. It’s like these people enjoy ruining things. But is it good business for them to ruin and humiliate the US during the World Cup? [Guardian]
Meanwhile Laura Loomer thinks we should cancel the World Cup, because she’s scared people from Africa are going to get Ebola all over her. She’s racist. [Media Matters]
Ken Paxton’s former lawyer has endorsed James Talarico LOL. [New York Times]
Trump has officially nominated currently most enthusastic asslicker Todd Blanche to be his next personal attorney general. [New York Times]
Fox News idiot Brian Kilmeade, the one who always looks like he just got hit in the face with a Looney Tunes ACME anvil, is pretty sure Trump’s lost war in Iran is going to be over in two weeks, and America is gonna like it. [Media Matters]
OK that’s a fine place to stop tabs, we started with a loser, we ended with a loser, it’s all losers all the way up and down.
Tip your bartenders while you wait for more news!
Want to read more Evan than just what’s at Wonkette? Visit The Moral High Ground and subscribe to it!
Follow me on Instagram!
And on BlueSky!
And on Facebook!
Today’s hed gif source and also some news about right whales: https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/cats-being-insane-little-dudes
And your meme chat: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/253e84b0-eea0-4e28-b0bd-609d3edff314?utm_source=share
The thing with Paxton's lawyer is great, and funny, but please, Talarico, don't use it to spend the rest of the campaign chasing Republican votes you're never going to get.