BREAKING: Is Chuck Schumer A Hipster? (No, No He Is Not)
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No, your eyes do not deceive you: That is in fact a tiny cell phone picture of some nice lady giving Chuck Schumer a "purple nurple." Would it surprise you to find out that this lady is a faithful Wonkette fan? Probably not! Would it surprise you to find out that she molested New York's senior senator at some unbearably hip outdoor concert in Williamsburg (the Brooklyn one, not the colonial one) and that Chuck Schumer single-handedly saved that show, only to be met by baffled disdain from New York's apathetic hipsters? That may in fact be mildly surprising, so read on for the details.
BREAKING: Is Chuck Schumer A Hipster? (No, No He Is Not)
BREAKING: Is Chuck Schumer A Hipster? (No, No…
BREAKING: Is Chuck Schumer A Hipster? (No, No He Is Not)
No, your eyes do not deceive you: That is in fact a tiny cell phone picture of some nice lady giving Chuck Schumer a "purple nurple." Would it surprise you to find out that this lady is a faithful Wonkette fan? Probably not! Would it surprise you to find out that she molested New York's senior senator at some unbearably hip outdoor concert in Williamsburg (the Brooklyn one, not the colonial one) and that Chuck Schumer single-handedly saved that show, only to be met by baffled disdain from New York's apathetic hipsters? That may in fact be mildly surprising, so read on for the details.