Like most Americans, you have been on tenterhooks since hearing that Bristol would be Dancing Modestly With The Stars, wondering what exactly her stars-dancing-with outfit would look like.
When I saw this outfit I thought 'gypsy.' Now consider this: gypsy young'uns are often hot, but look at 'em when they get all old, toothless and wart-y, and the way they perfect the art of putting curses on things.
What's up with his pants? There's room enough for two in there.
Why is she wearing a doily? A giant doily.
The exact opposite of Torri Spelling.
Do the tendrils match the carpet or the drapes? No, but the shoes do.
She needs a flower in her hair or maybe a feather. Or a boa. Constrictor.
Why indeed?
No, but they helped sink a vice-presidential bid.
Her nose seems to be expanding. Pregnant again?
We've always got her smokin hot dance partner to fap to, Josh. So there!
You just know she's going to be galumphing around the stage like a cow on roller skates. Add fringe to that and let the cringing begin!!
When I saw this outfit I thought 'gypsy.' Now consider this: gypsy young'uns are often hot, but look at 'em when they get all old, toothless and wart-y, and the way they perfect the art of putting curses on things.