18 Comments
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102415's avatar

That's right, golf courses were on the list. Also gun shows.

π”…π”’π”’π”©π”·π”’π”Ÿπ”²π”Ÿπ”Ÿπ”ž's avatar

All they really have to do is give the conductor a cell phone. ("He's approaching the bridge ... text him now!")

π”…π”’π”’π”©π”·π”’π”Ÿπ”²π”Ÿπ”Ÿπ”ž's avatar

Snidely bin Whiplash, pursued by Dudley Do-Right, in camo and full body armor with night vision goggles.

π”…π”’π”’π”©π”·π”’π”Ÿπ”²π”Ÿπ”Ÿπ”ž's avatar

Bin Laden to wife #3: "Who <i>are</i> these guys?"

jqheywood's avatar

Sir Toppham Hat will scold the terrorists for causing confusion and delay, and will tell Percy that he has been really useful. Percy will just <i>beam</i>.

Sorry. I have 2 children and have endured more Thomas the Tank Engine than anyone should ever have to endure. In fact, I think that was what the CIA really did to KSM in the black sites. It would have worked on me.....

fuflans's avatar

it's generally a safe bet to assume jake gyllenhaal is dead.

in his movies at least.

SheriffRoscoe's avatar

I figured they would have scored the motherlode of intelligence information from the computers and documents seized during that raid. And I fully expected news to come trickling out in dribs and drabs about what they were up to, along with warnings and fresh, new inconveniences and hurdles for us to put up with....But I nevah, evah, in my wildest dreams, expected them to be planning to <i>derail a train</i> on the ten-year anniversary of 9/11. Jesus.

fuflans's avatar

in a related development, <i>Al-Qaeda Russia</i> was contracted to boris and natasha.

AngryBlakGuy's avatar

...derailing trains? Obviously a plot designed by liberal islamic fascists to destroy Ayn Rands dreams!!!!

PsycWench's avatar

"Snakes <strike>On</strike> Off a Train"

SheriffRoscoe's avatar

Wouldn't a roller coaster derailment have been more terrorizing? I mean, to more of the general population?

Joshua Norton's avatar

According to CNN, Bin Laden is dead! Still!

And this just in - dead!

Too bad the 24-hour cable channels just can't seem to advance this historic story except to tell us the same shit over and over and over again.

Monsieur_Grumpe's avatar

I can’t wait for Thomas the Tank Engine and the Terrorists to come out. Maybe they can get Ringo to come back for this special episode.