CNN’s Kaitlan Collins Stuffs JD Vance In Locker

Hoists him up by his own butthair, runs over him, backs up, does it again, etc.

May 02, 2024

Occasionally CNN features acts of journalism, and Kaitlan Collins did just that last night when she hosted Republican Senator JD Vance, the man Mitt Romney disrespects the most, the snotnosed, Yale-educated dilettante who decided he’d be more successful just grifting the methbillies he previously elegied, because maybe he was a fraud this whole time anyway.

We’ll highlight three moments.

Collins was asking Vance about the campus Gaza protests, and he was trying to draw a distinction between students exercising their First Amendment rights and people doing damage to university buildings, etc.

Collins saw her opportunity:

COLLINS: OK. So, you agree that people who break in and vandalize a building should be prosecuted?

VANCE: Exactly.

Exactly, he said.

COLLINS: OK. I'm just checking because you did help raise money for people who did so on January 6, which was impeding an official proceeding, breaking into a building that they weren't allowed to be in, and vandalizing the Capitol …

Damn.

VANCE: Well, Kaitlan, I know that this is the obsession of the national media to talk about what happened two years ago, three years ago, on January the 6, as opposed to talk about the future.

Who can possibly remember historical events that happened TWO, THREE YEARS AGO? No one was alive then!

COLLINS: It's not an obsession. I'm just seeing if it's a double standard.

You know, just checking.

Then they talked about the recent disaster at the Supreme Court where Donald Trump’s attorneys argued that he he could overthrow the government as an “official act,” and the illegitimate MAGA hacks of the Court were like “THAT’S RIGHT, FUCK AMERICA!”

This exchange also did not go well for Vance.

COLLINS: I want to get your take on what we saw happen last week, those immunity arguments before the Supreme Court, where Trump's team, his attorney argued that a president could order the military to stage a coup, and to have their political opponent assassinated, and be immune from prosecution, unless this theory that they were impeached and then convicted by the Senate.

Do you share the view that presidents are basically above the law?

But that’s not what they said! protested JD Vance, with many babble words.

COLLINS: But let me stop you right there. Because I listened to this. It's John Sauer, Trump's attorney. And when he was asked by one of the justices, if the president could order the military to stage a coup, and would it count as an official act, meaning he couldn't be prosecuted for it? He said it would depend on the circumstances.

I mean, what circumstances warrant a president ordering the military to stage a coup?

VANCE: Well, first of all, I did say it depends on the circumstances. That opens up a whole lot of avenue for context there.

But more importantly, Kaitlan, he's just saying that would count as an official act.

See? Trump’s lawyer was merely saying that if Trump ordered the military to stage a coup against the United States, it could be an official act. How is that not totally fine?

Vance, a liar, moreover told Collins that Trump did not order a coup to overturn the election (he did, for months), but simply “encouraged people to protest peacefully.”

To which we reply that JD Vance is an overgrown pile of human butthair and can read Jack Smith’s indictment all on his own, or he can just go fuck himself. Whatever.

Finally, Collins wanted to know why Vance is doing cumtrails in the sky to be Trump’s running mate, considering how Trump tried to get his last VP killed. “Does it give you any pause whatsoever about taking that job when you see how he treated his last vice president?” she asked. This is maybe the most pathetic exchange of all:

COLLINS: The last time I checked, President Biden wasn't […] approving of the chants to hang his vice president, and did not call his vice president, when their life was in danger, on Capitol Hill, something that Mike Pence himself has testified to.

So my question is does it give you any pause to be his vice president, given how he has treated Mike Pence?

VANCE: Kaitlan, I'm extremely skeptical that Mike Pence's life was ever in danger. I think politics — in politics, people like to really exaggerate things, from time to time. I know a lot of folks, in the Democratic Party —

COLLINS: I think Mike Pence would disagree with that, Senator.

Just maybe!

Shall we remind ourselves how close Mike Pence got to being murdered that day, as Trump played with himself and cheered the “Hang Mike Pence” chants from the White House, instigating the terrorists further? How Pence was only 40 feet from the terrorists as he was being evacuated, as Trump was egging them on via Twitter?

Let’s revisit the January 6 hearings:

Rep. Pete Aguilar (D-Calif.) revealed in the hearing that “a confidential informant from the Proud Boys told the FBI the Proud Boys would have killed Mike Pence if given a chance.” Given that members of the Proud Boys were both among the earliest arrivals inside the building and had a demonstrated predilection for violence, that’s not an idle threat. […]
The crowd was already furious at Pence; Trump’s tweet seemed like “pouring gasoline on the fire,” as one former White House aide said in recorded testimony.

But JD Vance is skeptical, or he’s lying garbage pretending that — all these THREE YEARS LATER — he’s skeptical.

It’s a wonder there’s nobody in Vance’s life who has communicated to him that he’s not sharp enough to do mainstream media. He should just prairie dog around in Steve Bannon’s undercarriage, where it’s safe.

[CNN transcript / videos via Aaron Rupar]