36 Comments
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bobbert's avatar

Now, I have to be honest and admit that I once wore a 'stache like that (although not the hat). In about 1977.

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bobbert's avatar

Isn't "Other than Laguna Beach, avoid any part of OC" sufficient?

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bobbert's avatar

Madison?

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Lefty Mark's avatar

<blockquote>In fact, he told Wonkette’s favorite disgraced former chaplain Gordon “Dr. Chaps” Klingenschmitt, there is nothing unusual about tapwater smelling like an oil well or catching on fire, because according to Science Facts that he happens to know real good, it’s all perfectly natural.</blockquote> Well you know, so is <i>giardia lamblia</i> and coliform bacteria, but I sure as hell don't want to have any water that contains those things piped into my house.

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Lefty Mark's avatar

<i>And it burns burn burns, The ring of fire, the ring of fire.</i>

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Lefty Mark's avatar

Breakin' rocks in the... <i>deep well!</i> I fracked for gas and I caused hell, I fracked for gas and I caused hell...

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Lefty Mark's avatar

At one time we were all pornstar wannabes. Or at least we looked like it.

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Lefty Mark's avatar

Well then, have you seen Fanny R. Dixon?

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𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

There's some incredibly acidic boiling water in Yellowstone Park, that sure as hell would have been called "burning waters" by any injun who fell into it. But hydrocarbon-laced well water? If that's what Nature is providing, one would find someplace else to dig a well, no? I'm pretty damned sure that the gas and flames are new "features", courtesy of the fracking operation next door.

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Zippy W. Pinhead's avatar

wasn't he one of the recipients of all those Koch brothers millions that flooded Colorado?

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Zippy W. Pinhead's avatar

only the <a href="http:\/\/www.huffingtonpost.com\/2014\/08\/08\/sketchfactor-app-white-creators_n_5660205.html" target="_blank">sketchy parts</a>

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Zippy W. Pinhead's avatar

maybe we'll get lucky and he'll do too many hallucinogens and see a tax cut deep within the bonfire

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Spurning Beer's avatar

Caution: Do not drink burning water if you have a flamboyant mustache, or if your mouth, nose, and surrounding areas are made living tissue.

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Spurning Beer's avatar

And what about the Black Helicopters? (Or is that a band....)

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Zippy W. Pinhead's avatar

I used to work an event at our local movie studio/theme park called Gay West- it was all about pornstaches and assless chaps (yes, they're all assless but in this case, obviously so). One of the best years featured Thelma Houston doing her hit song- the crowd ate it up.

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Spurning Beer's avatar

Motherfrackers, all of them.

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