Olds. They are always burning up your phone like "how do I get to the Wonkette.com?" and "what's a url?" and "oh no I accidentally attempted to rape a young lady while the Skype was skypeing and the police saw the Skype and now I am IN JAIL!" Learn some computer stuff, olds! Don't go to JAIL!
Time to roll out the <a href="http:\/\/wonkette.com\/563777\/elizabeth-warren-is-being-a-badass-again-because-it-is-a-day" target="_blank">John Grisham</a> defense. Um. Sort of.
I hope that this not mean he can&#039;t vote. That would be a fraud, unlike the tens of thousands of people who registered months ago but still aren&#039;t in the system.
Mr. Billy Joe was wearing his American Flag lapel pin. So he obviously loves America, and freedom, and guns, and Ronald Reagan.
Therefore, that 39-year old tramp was obviously trying to rape <i>him</i> with her Obama commie-, Benghazi-, IRA- slutiness. You must not only acquit, but <i>re-elect</i> Billy Joe for another eleventy terms for Jeebus.
It&#039;s because they love organized labor so much.
No wait, it&#039;s because they love the victorious northern states in the Civil War.
No wait, fuck it, makes no sense at all. The cognitive dissonance caused by the name of this county will probably play a large role in Turnage&#039;s defense.
<i>pointing at her &hellip; couch?</i>
you misspelled &#039;cooch&#039;
For the win!
Something to do with holding something between the legs and not being on skype.
Not that he knows of ...
... but now that you mention it, O&#039;Keefe does look a little rapey right around the eyes.
...since she isn&#039;t pregnant I don&#039;t think this qualifies as &quot;legitimate rape&quot;
Is <em>that</em> how &quot;Union Country&quot; got its name?
Time to roll out the <a href="http:\/\/wonkette.com\/563777\/elizabeth-warren-is-being-a-badass-again-because-it-is-a-day" target="_blank">John Grisham</a> defense. Um. Sort of.
Being in jail is going to make completing the rest of his bucket list a lot harder.
I hope that this not mean he can&#039;t vote. That would be a fraud, unlike the tens of thousands of people who registered months ago but still aren&#039;t in the system.
Ladies and Gentlemen of the Jury,
Mr. Billy Joe was wearing his American Flag lapel pin. So he obviously loves America, and freedom, and guns, and Ronald Reagan.
Therefore, that 39-year old tramp was obviously trying to rape <i>him</i> with her Obama commie-, Benghazi-, IRA- slutiness. You must not only acquit, but <i>re-elect</i> Billy Joe for another eleventy terms for Jeebus.
The defense rests.
It&#039;s because they love organized labor so much.
No wait, it&#039;s because they love the victorious northern states in the Civil War.
No wait, fuck it, makes no sense at all. The cognitive dissonance caused by the name of this county will probably play a large role in Turnage&#039;s defense.
Taking &quot;The Camera Is Always On&quot; to a whole new level...
Billy Joe Bob forgot to bring the <a href="https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch\?v=ftY2p0L8F-Q" target="_blank">marriage sack</a> .