133 Comments

If his last name were "Kilmore," he'd be a shoo in.

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He'd take one for the team. That's what the omega does.

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Jeb!/Gilmore 2016!"Let's shrug and boring up this country some, huh?"

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"Deluded Willie Loman type," now who does that remind me of?

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Mmmmmmm, sweet, sweet Virginia honey haunches.

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That's sounds like a previously-unknown encore verse to this song:

https://www.youtube.com/wat...

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This is wrong. It has to change. And when I’m president, it’s going to change.

Short version: This is never going to change.

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But he's a Republican omega, wh/ means his priority is himself - he's last over the top, first into the lifeboats, etc.

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Okay, so I know who Droopy Dog, Lurch and Matlock are, but who the hell are all these other people mentioned in the article?

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"...and when I'm President, It's going to change", so what you are saying is that it's never going to change.

It did seem like he said some reasonable things about not being a racist asshole at the end. I looked at him Wikipedia page afterwords and noted that though he is opposed to abortion he did increase funding for adoption when he was governor, so at least he doesn't immediately come across as a hypocrite. He may actually be the least worst option. This means he hasn't a chance in hell.

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Feel the Gilmormentum!

Wait. I can do better. I'll get back to you.

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yeah, about that guy, America....sorries.

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Gimore doesn't even look like a guy who would get picked to play the president in a low budget sci fi movie.

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Yes, but she isn't doing much to dispel the rumor that she's the mastermind behind it, either. She's a candidate, she needs to at least attempt to say ahead of the news cycle.

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Wow! They went all out for Lincoln Chafee 2, This Time It's Gilmore

Also the new name is a hell of a lot better than "Chafee." That'll teach you to ask Riense Proboscis for advice!

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no one's promising to build latex condos for me to live in either.

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