Some Conservative guy went to Japan, where he had an out-of-body experience/found Jesus because man, the Japanese make a "mean toilet"! He bought himself one of these miracle machines immediately, of course: So, my beloved Japanese toilet now finds itself ensconced in my bathroom — look, this is going to get personal, okay? — near my shower, which sports a sunflower-sized showerhead, which rains buckets and buckets of soothing water onto the bather, the entire room lit by hot-burning incandescent bulbs with 100 watts apiece of wake-up brightness.
Actually the funniest bit of this dude's rant? No Real Merkin average Joe Shitpack teabagger is able to afford to import his own specialized magic number-two-time terlet throne.
But hey, if you're a conservatard trooper, you are compelled to fight for the right of tubby authordudes to have the most comfortable poopies ever. Just as the founding fathers intended!
He also wrote <i>&quot;Also, it took me the entire week to make it through the user&rsquo;s manual....&quot;</i>
I&#039;ll bet he read and endorsed the Patriot Act quicker. I&#039;ll bet he read and condemned health care reform bill quicker. But, to be fair, that&#039;s faster than Bush read &quot;My Pet Goat&quot; on 9/11 while the nation was under attack.
Time for an Inconvenient Poop.
Actually the funniest bit of this dude&#039;s rant? No Real Merkin average Joe Shitpack teabagger is able to afford to import his own specialized magic number-two-time terlet throne.
But hey, if you&#039;re a conservatard trooper, you are compelled to fight for the right of tubby authordudes to have the most comfortable poopies ever. Just as the founding fathers intended!
He also wrote <i>&quot;Also, it took me the entire week to make it through the user&rsquo;s manual....&quot;</i>
I&#039;ll bet he read and endorsed the Patriot Act quicker. I&#039;ll bet he read and condemned health care reform bill quicker. But, to be fair, that&#039;s faster than Bush read &quot;My Pet Goat&quot; on 9/11 while the nation was under attack.
Is that a metric toilet?
Hahaha, Wookies said &quot;the movement.&quot;
Poop-centered math: Number one. Number two. And the turd.
Some people won&#039;t shut up about their BMs.
...the Duesenberg of dropping-off-the-Cosby-kids-at-the-pool....
...the Bearcat of the Bristol Stool Chart....
And continue to make the greens mad by leaving your windows open while your HVAC goes full blast! Buy the car with the worst gas mileage you can find!
In fact, just drive along the highway throwing dollar bills out the window! That&#039;ll show &#039;em!
Well...you know what they say...Incandescent lightbulbs for incandescent douchebags.